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Does anyone feel the same? - Discussions, questions
Does anyone feel the same?
September 16, 2023 at 15:01 (UT/GMT)

Does anyone feel the same?
It seems like the vast majority of people get into relationships without fully knowing who they are. After some time, they realise they are a different person and they break up with their partner because they develop at different speeds, levels or the other person remains stagnant.
There´s also a second category of people who say things like: I want us to be toghether so that we can both grow as individuals.
I also find this odd because the result is often the same; you grow apart.
Isn´t it better to have a solid foundation of what your beliefs are, what you like/dislike, how you project your personality etc, before you get into a committed relationship?
I don´t think it is a matter of independence, but rather how confident you are in your convictions. At the end of the day, who are you without that person?
Could we look at this from the perspective of Moon signs? Which ones crave relationships like oxygen and which ones exhibit a degree of unflinching conviction?
There´s also a second category of people who say things like: I want us to be toghether so that we can both grow as individuals.
I also find this odd because the result is often the same; you grow apart.
Isn´t it better to have a solid foundation of what your beliefs are, what you like/dislike, how you project your personality etc, before you get into a committed relationship?
I don´t think it is a matter of independence, but rather how confident you are in your convictions. At the end of the day, who are you without that person?
Could we look at this from the perspective of Moon signs? Which ones crave relationships like oxygen and which ones exhibit a degree of unflinching conviction?


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September 16, 2023 at 20:52
ElsaX
Funny how you approach the topic of relationships as if it is just a logical puzzle to be solved
Oh wait, you´re a gemini - lol
Beliefs, likes/dislikes: all these things are subject to change, anyway.
Most people enter into relationships because they are in love/lust/passion, and that tends to blind us to a certain extent.
yes, it would be great if we could work out with the other person what it is we´re expecting from the relationship, what the silent assumptions are, and then go from there.
That would rather kill the romance, in my view, so choosing someone who´s open minded and a good communicator would help to address these things when the relationship is already underway.
But hey - I´m no expert: 48 and single, and currently choosing to stay that way, so don´t listen to me
Oh wait, you´re a gemini - lol
Beliefs, likes/dislikes: all these things are subject to change, anyway.
Most people enter into relationships because they are in love/lust/passion, and that tends to blind us to a certain extent.
yes, it would be great if we could work out with the other person what it is we´re expecting from the relationship, what the silent assumptions are, and then go from there.
That would rather kill the romance, in my view, so choosing someone who´s open minded and a good communicator would help to address these things when the relationship is already underway.
But hey - I´m no expert: 48 and single, and currently choosing to stay that way, so don´t listen to me


September 16, 2023 at 21:09

Oh wait, you´re a gemini - lol"
--> Well, if we all went in blinded by what we call "true love" then the world would go to hell. Oh wait...

Jokes aside, I think there comes a point when you can separate practical matters such as communications issues and boundaries from emotional influences like lust/insecurity/neediness etc.
I don´t think the two should ever mix. You don´t get a free pass just because I like you. If you are bad at communicating your feelings,thoughts and desires then I can help you work on that (if you request help); or you can work on it by yourself. But letting it slide for the sake of keeping the relationship alive and being together due to fear of being alone is problematic...
Same goes for me. If I am bad at expressing myself, then I shouldn´t expect the other person to put up with my issues.
Overall, I think it´s dangerous to throw yourself in with all your passion, without some logical reasoning. I always ask myself: What value am I going to get if I involve myself with you?

September 16, 2023 at 21:23


September 16, 2023 at 21:26
ElsaX
» NotYourEnemy
Yes, I agree with you that there has to be a certain extent of thought that goes into getting involved with someone, but everyone is different about what they value.
Some people care a lot if the other person can provide for them, or only care about the other person´s looks and how they make them look in turn, or value companionship above everything else.
I don´t think there´s a standard guide you can apply or publish that´s perfect for everyone to follow.
People are at different stages in their development, like different things, value different things.
Just live and let live: if it doesn´t impact you directly, why be bothered?
I mean, good topic to think about to figure out your own approach to relationships, but it won´t get you any results getting frustrated about other people´s behaviour
Some people care a lot if the other person can provide for them, or only care about the other person´s looks and how they make them look in turn, or value companionship above everything else.
I don´t think there´s a standard guide you can apply or publish that´s perfect for everyone to follow.
People are at different stages in their development, like different things, value different things.
Just live and let live: if it doesn´t impact you directly, why be bothered?
I mean, good topic to think about to figure out your own approach to relationships, but it won´t get you any results getting frustrated about other people´s behaviour

September 16, 2023 at 21:46

Theres so much to it. Astrology kind of helped me realise a lot about relationships.

September 16, 2023 at 21:50

But as an old cynical like me, I find that people have neglected to find the connection that will make it work. a lot of times they do not want to give up as they have already invested a lot of time/energy into "it" and hope it will work out.. but usually the other person will run a mile...hence there are so many questions in our horary and synastry sections......
Yes, you are right that we all need to think before we jump into " a relationship", because love and romance is not a "long term thing". No one is talking about TLC to keep the relationship stronger.
Yes I think some moon signs crave for love more than others. But we also should use our "mercury" to do a thorough analysis before we commit into "longer term" relationships.
Of course, the society around us is selling the forever happy after stories in movies, music and TV and other media....so we feel we must have it too.

September 16, 2023 at 21:53

Oh no. These were my thoughts I formed when observing other people and I just feel confused as to how I should approach this when the time comes for me to get into a relationship.
I feel like a lot of people have been brainwashed to think that there is only 1 or 2 ways to behave in a relationship and anything outside the norm is not desirable. I don´t want people to have this expectation from me...I hope there are still people out there who think and behave differently.
"People are at different stages in their development, like different things, value different things."
I´m also having a hard time coming to terms with this. On the one hand, you want someone who has things in common with you. But on the other hand, you don´t want someone who is exactly like you.


September 16, 2023 at 21:54

September 16, 2023 at 21:55



September 16, 2023 at 22:01

We look for partners we think are right based on anecdotal evidence from the people around us. Monkey see, monkey do.
If only we stopped copying each others patterns and created our own...

September 16, 2023 at 22:11

I think we grow together and also alone...not only together or alone...
There are some things that we prove only if we face another person...
And intimate relationship where both are very open are different than those, where people walk just on surface...
But yes, I agree some awareness is needed if we dont want to feed just our instictive/unconscious level...but I dont think it relate to relationships, but to character of people, if they want to know themselves...if they want to know truth...and also if parents or someone show them this possibility and learn them self-reflection and so on...
I had not much relationships...I am not that person who crave relationships...but if I decided for someone/fell in love, I definitely crave this person and relationship with him x)


September 17, 2023 at 08:30

I mean I have a rather naive looking Cancer rising, and people tend to wanna push me and they think they can lol
But my Virgo sun and Aquarius moon says "Its not gonna happen." I´ve had guys wanna take advantage of me before, they thought they could use me and then get rid of me. But I could sense it a mile away.
My moon conjunct Neptune in the 8th house sometimes clouds my judgement, I learned to be more assertive with years.
Now talking more about the topic of "relationships" I know that more sensitive folk with water moons won´t get me, but the most important part when it´s not working anymore - is to let go. Thats what I do and I was successful with that before.
I let go of people who weren´t into me anymore or so, there are lots of ways you can distract yourself...
I´m not a good psychologist, but open minded to that topic. Everyone has a different story so I can´t judge. If you feel like you and the partner are drifting apart - it is natural to me, and that doesn´t mean I don´t love them anymore, but it means you should understand that your partner deserves to be happy, even if it means without myself.
I hope this doesn´t sound too depressive :)

September 17, 2023 at 09:52

My follow-up question would be this: How do you create meaningful relationships (not only romantic) if you have to keep letting go of people who will not better you?
I end up isolating myself or pushing away others because all the people I meet are like this? They just don´t want anything deep. Only superficial "let´s talk about the weather and what I had for dinner" type of individuals...
If you confront them about this they say "oh, well I just met you, I don´t know/want to talk about anything with more substance". That is the moment I shut down and just slowly drift away.

September 17, 2023 at 10:02

this is so much moon in 12th
namaste brother :)

September 17, 2023 at 11:37

I understand what you mean by saying you don´t like superficiality.
To establish more meaningful connections, is to let people actually grow close to you, and I mean be comfortable and feel accepted as well. I think thats the only way.
Because others are sensitive too and they need to feel safe until they can open up about personal subjects.
Not sure how this works though, but if your someone who wants more deep connections and people around are just very shallow then, you either find more like-minded individuals (sometimes it can be hard) or try to be more flexible with others instead to shutting down.
Give them space and if they are "your people" trust me it will last.
For relationships it´s the same thing, those who are meant - they will stay. Thats how the universe works :)
I guess this sounds a bit basic, but I just wanted to share my insight on something like this topic.
Someone might say "its easy to say but hard to do so" - and its true to some extent, unless you are very detached and objective (everyone´s different)
I can be very sensitive at times with people, I´ve been shutting down too, so I understand for that part how it feels. When nobody seems to get me and being too "different" from others.
Maybe I don´t even know what I´m saying, I´ve had my ups and downs in life, people just come and go all the time - thats how life works and you have to accept it. And I think each person will achieve it of simply letting go...
It depends individually, but either give yourself some time or others, and everything will be in its place.
It can be difficult, but in most cases achievable, so I´m not saying something unrealistic. I hope this does answer the question in some way even if that´s what most people answer.

September 17, 2023 at 13:46

" I hope this does answer the question in some way even if that´s what most people answer."
Yes! Thank you very much.


September 17, 2023 at 14:35


September 17, 2023 at 15:49

No one should feel trapped in it,as it is not normal,yes? But planing and building in 2 is a success of commitments. True love and at least little aware is key. Other things are called destiny. My personal view of best is strong love and passion,strength of it with years,and realy willing to small adopts and changes,and big will for success. Hopefully there are relationship giuided by pure love and intentions,by right path. I believe that there is that kind of love and relationship. And i wish we all have them. Flow of love 🔥❤🙏😇👫👨👩👧👦🌌

September 17, 2023 at 16:03

My moon is in Capricorn. a cold one but my south node is in Cancer which makes me very emotional and romantic.
If you ever found a selfless love, then know for sure that you´re lucky


September 17, 2023 at 21:45

September 17, 2023 at 22:04

What do you mean by such a capricorn thing to say ? Is there a relation between capricorn and selfishness ?
Thank you
Astral

September 17, 2023 at 22:25

LALAALLALA. My delusional self does not want to hear this kind of Saturn-talk. Now if you´ll excuse me, I will be going back to my fairytale realm.


September 18, 2023 at 07:49

Everyone says capricorns are cold. I don’t buy that realllly ☺️ because I’m not. That’s how i feel about love because it was selfish for me not for my Capricorn sign😂

September 18, 2023 at 07:52

Gotta give it to my Neptune in 7th house
… but I talk Saturn stuff when I feel like I have to


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