Why I intimidate men unintentionally? - Discussions, questions

Zephyrin » dreamtripp I wish I had deluded myself.

Why I said "intimidate" is that they make it clear they have an intention to get closer with me but they just stand and keep communicating, no actual effort, no honesty but just shallow chats. I wondered if I bore them or talk too much shit but they would cut off the communication in this case, wouldn´t they? No, they still want to be around and show their presence. They do not ghost (I hoped they do because at least that would be understandable). Secondly, I thought they interact with lots of women and they do the same to every woman but surprisingly, it wasn´t. That´s why I assumed that they are afraid of something about me.

"Maybe ask someone why they may feel intimidated by you, if you think that is the case."

Well, one of my friends used to say that I´m quite pessimistic about love but I´m gonna ask her this question, too.

Zephyrin » Cind Thank you for the clarification, I hadn´t paid much attention to progressed chart before Lilith seems to be a trouble sometimes but it is not a big deal except making me look like an evil witch. Maybe she has something to do with SN; A scandalous life with evil karma brought from ancestors, ugh.

There is also Neptune in 1st. God... I hope this chart does not put me into trouble Looks creepy.

Pluto/Chiron conjunction makes sense a lot in 11th house. Besides giving an introverted attitude, it also gave me an abusive friend who stole my stuff and just vanished.

"Also Pluto in your 11th is now exactly square progressed venus in 8th"

That makes more sense than Venus/Pluto trine. There is always something harsh, insurmountable in relationships and I get hurt.

This also made me think that perhaps the reason why the relationships sucked in past is because of the surroundings´ intentions. There were probably gossips and incitements.

Zephyrin » LaurenCapricorn Yeah, thank you for saying this, I was expecting a comment about Lilith

No doubt she influences my fashion sense which is good to have but in relationships, she may not be good I guess. There was someone handsome who have Lilith in 1st house just like me and his presence made me feel rather uncomfortable and however honest(!) he was, there was nothing to ease this effect. When I think about it in my case, I can say that we seem simply unreliable. However, considering what others said about my chart, I should not only blame her.

Zephyrin » JWo There is Gemini in 7th house. They enjoy talking with me as far as I experience but one of my partners said that "You look deceptive all the time and you probably cheated on me."

I guess Gemini gives that vibe in my 7th house unfortunately. Constantly there were lots of offensive criticism towards my appearance, style etc and lots of quarrels about the cheats I hadn´t done.

The more quiet I remain, the more confident they become to hurt me verbally. More blame, more curse. So the 7th house brought me men with typical unevolved Gemini attitude, nothing deep.

Cind If this is something you have noticed recently then I am guessing it´s because your progressed ascendant is moving closer to the asteroid lilith.

Also Pluto in your 11th is now exactly square progressed venus in 8th

dreamtripp Nothing is unintentional, though certain things are done unconsciously.

You intimidate them, because you believe that you intimidate them or interactions you had in the past solidified that belief in you head.

Maybe ask someone why they may feel intimidated by you, if you think that is the case.

Nothing in your chart is going to show someone else´s reaction to you, because it is their reaction.

nutelina » Zephyrin Nah, you just have a very strong Sun, Moon and rising ruled by Jupiter. And I haven´t read your chart yet. I´m sure you have a strong personality.

LaurenCapricorn Another factor that no one mentioned, could be your lilith in first house.

JWo What does your 7th house look like ‘for others’?

AmberMoon » Zephyrin Lol, yes, the Gemini tongue 🙂, its ruler is stationed (somewhat) safely in Taurus trying to counterbalance Sun and Mars´ joined forces in Gemini.

Glad you´re having a good time here.

Enjoy!

Zephyrin » AmberMoon "And most of them did not react well to being addressed first. Which I still don´t understand."

I totally understand. They want to be neither the first nor the last. They fail and flee like a pussycat when in attempt to scare or pressure on you if you´re formidable enough.

We both have similar placements and aspects. Sun/Mars, Mars/Rahu conjunction, Lilith in 1st house... wow. It also would not be wrong to think that Mars is the responsible in terms of intimidation besides the fire dominance.

"I will react, but not aggressively, not physically at least, and definitely not vulgar either (it goes against my Venus in Leo 🙂)."

You´re a Gemini, you may even kill them with your tongue

In my case, peace is never an ultimate option because I have enemies around, not here at least. Astro-seek makes me feel comfortable and I like the people here, I´m glad.

AmberMoon I feel you girl (have a look at my chart ;) ).

In my teen years I didn´t wait for a boy to notice me. And most of them did not react well to being addressed first. Which I still don´t understand.

And yes, in traffic and on the workfloor I will keep surprising men trying to intimidate me. I don´t like it, and I will react, but not aggressively, not physically at least, and definitely not vulgar either (it goes against my Venus in Leo 🙂).

But yeah, sharing the feeling of a broader misunderstanding, if I understood you well 😉

Zephyrin » JayJayAstrology "What is your timeline - when did you start noticing an increase of restlessness and "strength" in your interactions?"

It was February 2020 and I knew that I have no more tolerance for some situations. All the abusive men including my father went away from my life. Capricorn might have played a role in this. It was hard to heal. There were threats from my ex, an obsessive effort to reach me but all they went away I´m glad...

Also agree with the nurturing part, there is so much work to do and they just look at my face, waiting to be completed. I take it very serious and it becomes a necessity to calm down nowadays.

Literally hated the SN/NN transits for 2 years... I just wait it to pass like nothing but it seems that is not possible.

ram_goat » JayJayAstrology Maybe that´s not your point . . . but . . . hey, we´re just having a conversation.


well sometimes we speak directly, other times, indirectly..

is there a message in each case? of course there is.

JayJayAstrology » ram_goat I know, but it doesn´t hurt to share the wisdom of having been around a while. Sometimes it´s helpful. Some 21-year olds are surprisingly mature and understand so much more than I did at that age! I´m not going to decide for someone else if they are mature enough to understand what I would like to share! Maybe that´s not your point . . . but . . . hey, we´re just having a conversation.

ram_goat » JayJayAstrology someone who can let her be who she is and not be intimidated.

well this often pays dividends in private..

but this takes some intelligence to perceive on the front side..
before you can reap the benefits on the back side..

but at age 21.. forget about guys understanding this.

guys that age are still struggling to understand masculinity, themselves.

ram_goat » JayJayAstrology Well, I would be surprised if at your age and maturity, you didn´t understand this already.. decades ago. But age 21, that´s another story. At 21 people- regardless of gender, are still trying to fit the pieces together, as best they can. Whatever their own maturity level allows them.

JayJayAstrology » Zephyrin Oh - you have TR Pluto conjunct your South Node in Capricorn. That´s a pretty big thing. Using a 1 degree orb, it began in December 2020. It is now coming back retrograde and will start the 1-degree conjunct on July 2021. It stations at 24 degrees on your natal SN on Oct 4 and goes back direct. Again, using a 1 degree orb, it´s over by Dec 21, 2021 - but I but you feel it a while after.

What is your timeline - when did you start noticing an increase of restlessness and "strength" in your interactions?

Your past life is in Capricorn, 1st house - which implies that you were a leader in the past life - someone who took responsibility for others at your own expense. You worked hard. Often, when people are leaders, they have to make very difficult decisions that affect others. they make enemies and sometimes they are harshly judged. Since the SN represents a wound - you could have come back to heal a judgement made - so you can let that go. Pluto on the SN would be asking you to look at that - to look at what of Capricorn, 1st house you need to let go of. First house is also leadership. The two big leadership signs are Aries and Capricorn.

I beieve it was Ram Goat who said, you need to nurture yourself, and I bet he was reading the North Node - in Cancer, 7th. That´s the balance needed. You don´t have to be of service this time around - even if you like to be - and if you do, it truly needs to be balanced with self-nurture - in relationship. It´s about learning to allow others to carry some of the burden - to be a partner in the making of solutions - and not have to go it alone. Those Cancer 7th house placements help you to be more sensitive to others. So, tune into your Cancer planets - it could help.

Anyway, there could be other influences - but the Pluto transit just popped out at me. It´s also opposing natal Mars.

ClifftheCause » Zephyrin Thank you and no problem.

Speaking of Capricorn. Your south node in the first house is in Capricorn. This means you have expressed Capricorn trait in many of your past lives and it is natural for you and it is in your house of self.

That south node in Capricorn in the first house definetly plays a role in your looking like a Capricorn. While your natal ascendant is Sagittarius, like myself, your progressed ascendant will be in Capricorn.

If you haven´t already learned about the north and south node in astrology, I can´t recommend enough looking into them.

JayJayAstrology » ram_goat Totally agree. Strong can be quiet, soft-spoken and an introvert. I just meant confident within - someone who can let her be who she is and not be intimidated. OFTEN, it isn´t a macho type.

Zephyrin » ClifftheCause "Like I have know plenty of Leo sun women to start fights with guys."

Haha exactly, we do it more violently if there is someone who is insolent or does mansplaining.


"Also given Capricorn is intercepted for you I think that might have some role to play since Capricorn is the father and indicate relationships with men overall."

Yeah, that may be one of the reasons why men are the chains in my ankle every time and I look more like a Capricorn too.

You have sensible thoughts, thank you

JayJayAstrology » Zephyrin Oh, and I forgot to mention that Sag has really high standards. I have a Sag Moon, and I have to say that with my Virgo rising - these two - both have very high standards - and - makes it difficult to compromise. Relationship really is about compromise. Aries and Sagittarius don´t easily compromise. Luckily, Leo can compromise a bit more easily. But still - having a lot of fire is just SO independent. And honestly, we don´t NEED relationship as much as other elements. I´m not saying we don´t need friends - because of course, we do. I get along really well with other Fire people. Get two Aries together and it can be so much fun! The conversation is lively and above all - we really do like to have fun. Butt heads a little and we know it´s good-natured. You can actually see energy bouncing off the walls when two Aries sit down over a beer.

I´ll look at your transits in a bit.

Zephyrin » SoM30nE Who am I, the prime minister?

ram_goat » rohini moon So, you´re on the right track, look for honest souls around you... if you emit that kind of energy, I do believe you´ll attract it.. same as anything else...


here is the real world problem.. in here honesty is easy..

out in the real world, it´s much more complicated.

but that is also a lesson in seeing through the bullshit in life.

so practice honesty in here first, then try to practice it in real life as best you can.

of course the two domains are different.. but also, they connect in certain places too.

Zephyrin » JayJayAstrology "Sag rising can be very strong as well - sometimes overpowering. It´s very engaging and it can be competitive and express itself very strongly."

That is so true. Sometimes I feel the discomfort of people around me just because I seemed competitive without intention. I guess they perceive it as a threat to their life. That´s probably why I have only one girl friend. It seems her Uranus dominance is able to tolerate my fiery nature.

It is extremely hard to find someone to get along well; for love? it seems impossible. Most men assume they are confident but when it comes to taking action, they disappear or become ultimate drama queens. Wow so original.

I noticed that Aries IC makes me restless about everything and I may easily gain enemies with my tongue. Ugh.

Hope I may slow myself in the following days because I feel lots of fire energy inside me recently and have no idea how to deal with it. Water makes me feel calm for a little while at least.

Thank you for your time and comment Jay Jay.