Lilith vs Pluto vs Orcus... & a few other buddies.

April 29, 2019 at 14:06 (UT/GMT)
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:

Lilith vs Pluto vs Orcus... & a few other buddies.
I have all 3 prominent and i had an issue with sexuality, well not so much issue but i had to express it when i was much younger.
Odd things around sex and power struggles.

No abuse took place and no one was hurt well perhaps except myself at some point but i will try to explain.

I was unsure, i needed some love, physical love, but it hinged on a sexual side too, i would be 13 years old at this point. In foster care things really took off in this direction, I ended up hugging this other lad and the next time my social worker came he shamed me and said i attempted to have sex with him. Painful but i ended up sleeping outside of the bedroom on a mattress to split us up. My need for affection had grew and i gave off sexuality instead. I am not a gay guy or bisexual, at this point though i was very vulnerable.

So i learned from that.
Same age i had moved foster parent, i had massive pent up anger, abusive childhood and day in day out bullying at school, no excuse. My new carer bought me 2 gerbils, and i killed one.
I slammed it against the radiator until it could no longer move.
At the time i was not emotionally or mentally stable clearly.
No one ever did find out i killed it, i placed it back in the cage and went on my day like nothing happened, but i felt really bad inside, i felt terrible.
My carer found the dead gerbil and according to his words the other had nibbled it´s way out of the cage, so he set up mouse traps for it to catch it. Me being so emotionally controlled and steadfast, it was easy to look like i had nothing to do with it, but inside i was hurting.
My life went on like this.

I have done other things i will take to the grave with me, but did not involve death or hurting anyone.

Such as aged 14 i went to this massive water park and there was this really attractive girl, i could not help touching her butt and being around her, i just had this really strong urge, however after what looked like me just being an idiot and her she was enjoying the attention, her brother ended up trying to find me, i only knew by how that person looked at me and how he carried himself and his movement towards me, he never did find me.
Way too fast, way too good at blending in.

The thing is i never got away with anything, everything was a seemingly karmic thing.
I had a rival in the armed forces, he would try to flick people in the balls, but every time he did it to me i had zero reaction, because it never hit me in the balls but it hit my.... you know what instead, he could never fathom this, even when i told him, it don´t hurt...

So he must have thought i´m some tough guy or something, he had it out for me.
He had 3 girls round, i was still a virgin and had not been with a female. So he used my vulnerability against me.
He had dropped lucozade on my bed sheet the one time he entered my apartment room, it was an accident.
At this point i had learned from the stupid mistakes i did when i was much younger, so i was not going to be all sexual or out and open like i was in that swimming park.

We all had some drinks, i sat like an outsider, that guy saying why don´t you take her back to your room, you only have to stroke her hair, like he was telling me what to do. Me like an idiot did what he said, but it did not go terrible..

However him and his pal wanted sex, the only 1 getting sex that night was the guy who had it out for me.

The girl followed me to my room, i had left my window open by mistake.. so it was freezing cold, so she went back to the the guys friends room and slept in there the night, i threw up in toilet and next morning arrived.

So the guys friend is mad that he got no sex and the blame was pointed squarely on me. He walked to my room with his friend, he pointed straight away to this yellow mark, the mark he had left.

Now anyone with common sense knows if someone had pee´d themselves it would not leave a bright yellow stain, this stain is from the coloring used in the drink he had spilled, well that was it, that was the joke, i pissed myself according to him and that rumor spread fast.
Everyone was against me.
So i became a bit of a rogue, i stole food from people´s fridges, i also took advantage of them being unawares and going out some nights until i found 1 thing.
the guy in our battery was huge, an ex semi-pro bodybuilder, and i found his box of belongings in the room that holds peoples stuff for storage, i was not really after anything i was just nosy.
Found an old flip phone, went through it, mostly all pics of him body building, and a video.. this video is what shocked me to my core, i watched as he forced his penis into another recruit and guys were standing around him egging him on and this recruit was screaming his eyes out... I have done stupid things that i truly regret but this then put things into perspective faster than anything could, just what evil people i was around.

This would serve as a life message, and was the stop of anything darker happening with myself.,

Out of the Army aged 20, i meet my first GF, we are an instant match, we finish each others words, we know each others emotions, we are connected like we are one.
Cancer + Scorpio, excellent match. The problem though, 1 month later she mentions that she has health problems and that she is dying, i said ok, she said if you want to leave you can and that she fully understands.
I said no i will never leave you, i will be here until the end, and i followed through with it.
So much passion, so much sweet love, so much depth shared. she told me her story... i felt a connection that was merely not fathomable.

She died 3 years later, suddenly.. gone.

And i changed drastically even more.
I went to my father, he offered no support, i was alone.
Spent around 3 months alone in my room, playing video games, getting mad, punching my brick walls... all sorts.

Came out a better me, it was like going cold turkey.

I came to the conclusion i gave her the best i could have at the current state i was, at the version of myself i was, imperfect, many thing i wish i could have changed, but the sheer amount of perfection that did happen outweighed my self deprecating thoughts.
She passed loved and truly appreciated and some of her lives on through me.

One thing i uphold as i grew stronger and tougher mentally and emotionally is that i will never sway ever again, and the truth will be revealed. I can count on 1 hand how many have the balls or courage to go through anything like this and still say they are ok.. which i am, i´m fine, i´m an imperfect human that is striving for the best version of themselves.
If we can never look at our own dark side we never move forwards, we never become better.

I don´t know what summons someone to become like me, the transformation, it happened naturally, and my first GF is who got me into astrology, we could not fathom the connection we had and my mind clicked at the zodiac for unknown reasons, and here i am today sharing stuff that aught to make others crumble if they ever shared their dark sides.

Sun conjunct Pollux.
Jupiter conjunct Pollux.
Sun trine Lilith in Scorpio.

Sun trine Pluto in Scorpio.
Jupiter trine Pluto.
Sun conjunct Jupiter Cancer.
Sun conjunct Chiron.
Jupiter conjunct Chiron.
Chiron trine Pluto.

Ascendant square Pluto.
Mercury square Pluto.

Orcus conjunct Mercury. Orcus in Leo. This is a great read.…
My voice is deep, commanding and rather i can be charismatic.

Orcus is another God of the underworld.
Pluto is the known God of the underworld.

Orcus square Pluto.

I am aware i may attract extremes in opinion, this is what brutal truth looks like.
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April 29, 2019 at 19:55
System message: Post has been written by user David Evans, who already deleted profile on this website:
Who knows, but I suppose one will see where it all ends. Perhaps there are others like yourself?
I know I have struggled with the same anger, the same need for physical love (expressed differently though in my case), same "all-in" attitude to love.
Ya, this world is quite fucked up. Maybe Leo Asc squaring strong aspects in Scorpio like Sun, Pluto, probably Moon too, could explain it. To shine a Leo light on all the darkness perhaps, I have no clue yo.
April 29, 2019 at 20:53
(Taurus) » David Evans
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:
Love your expression my friend, i cannot undo myself.
There is no return, old routes and behaviors do not come back, for better of for worse i change.

Life... if we hide from it, we don´t understand it, how can anyone form anything without understanding?

Questions, answers tend to come from life though, to understand life you must live it.
April 29, 2019 at 23:01
(Taurus) » Liquidized.Mind.LM3992
System message: Post has been written by user David Evans, who already deleted profile on this website:
:15: :4:
April 30, 2019 at 15:15
System message: Post has been written by user La_Nina_de_Oro, who already deleted profile on this website:
What some may consider taboo has actually been "normal"to see. I´ve also had attracted extremes. Sounds like you gf was your twin flame. My extreme is not "normal" for others... Scorpio in Pluto-10th house.
May 1, 2019 at 06:31
(Taurus) IIyyaarr13
You have no stationary planets. You are not under the influence of any :78:
The chart extras usually operate intuitively and are therefore the hardest to prove as an influence! :67: :66: :48:
May 1, 2019 at 10:08
(Taurus) » IIyyaarr13
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:
There is influence.
Some of us understand our lives even if they are not perfect.

Sun & Jupiter conjunct Pollux 0 degree.
Sun conjunct Procyon.
Vega conjunct Neptune.

There is also Mesarthim & Hamal with Moon & Mars.

Sun conjunct Procyon: Great help from friends, gifts and legacies if not afflicted, military preferment after great struggles and expense. If rising or culminating, kingly preferment.

Castor and Pollux aspired to marry the Leucippides ("daughters of the white horse"), Phoebe and Hilaeira, whose father was a brother of Leucippus ("white horse").[i] Both women were already betrothed to cousins of the Dioscuri, the twin brothers Lynceus and Idas of Thebes, sons of Tyndareus´s brother Aphareus. Castor and Pollux carried the women off to Sparta wherein each had a son; Phoebe bore Mnesileos to Pollux and Hilaeira bore Anogon to Castor. This began a family feud among the four sons of the brothers Tyndareus and Aphareus.
Rape of the Daughters of Leucippus by Rubens, ca. 1618

The cousins carried out a cattle-raid in Arcadia together but fell out over the division of the meat. After stealing the herd, but before dividing it, the cousins butchered, quartered, and roasted a calf.[11] As they prepared to eat, the gigantic Idas suggested that the herd be divided into two parts instead of four, based on which pair of cousins finished their meal first.[11] Castor and Pollux agreed.[11] Idas quickly ate both his portion and Lynceus´ portion.[11] Castor and Pollux had been duped. They allowed their cousins to take the entire herd, but vowed someday to take revenge.[11]

Some time later, Idas and Lynceus visited their uncle´s home in Sparta.[11] The uncle was on his way to Crete, so he left Helen in charge of entertaining the guests, which included both sets of cousins, as well as Paris, prince of Troy.[11] Castor and Pollux recognized the opportunity to exact revenge, made an excuse that justified leaving the feast, and set out to steal their cousins´ herd.[11] Idas and Lynceus eventually set out for home, leaving Helen alone with Paris, who then kidnapped her.[11] Thus, the four cousins helped set into motion the events that gave rise to the Trojan War.

Meanwhile, Castor and Pollux had reached their destination. Castor climbed a tree to keep a watch as Pollux began to free the cattle. Far away, Idas and Lynceus approached. Lynceus, named for the lynx because he could see in the dark, spied Castor hiding in the tree.[11] Idas and Lynceus immediately understood what was happening. Idas, furious, ambushed Castor, fatally wounding him with a blow from his spear—but not before Castor called out to warn Pollux.[11] In the ensuing brawl, Pollux killed Lynceus. As Idas was about to kill Pollux, Zeus, who had been watching from Mt. Olympus, hurled a thunderbolt, killing Idas and saving his son.[11]

Returning to the dying Castor, Pollux was given the choice by Zeus of spending all his time on Mount Olympus or giving half his immortality to his mortal brother. He opted for the latter, enabling the twins to alternate between Olympus and Hades.[12][13] The brothers became the two brightest stars in the constellation Gemini ("the twins"): Castor (Alpha Geminorum) and Pollux (Beta Geminorum). As emblems of immortality and death, the Dioscuri, like Heracles, were said to have been initiated into the Eleusinian mysteries.[j]

According to Ptolemy it is of the nature of Mars; and, to Alvidas, of the Moon, Mars and Uranus. It gives a subtle, crafty, spirited, brave, audacious, cruel and rash nature, a love of boxing, dignified malevolence, and is connected with poisons. [Robson*, p.185-186.]

Pollux has a strong Martian nature and has the name ´the wicked boy´ of the of the sibling Twins. According to its nature, this star is brutal and tyrannical, violent and cruel if in conjunction with the Sun, Moon, Ascendant, MC or with malefics. Just as Mars has its good sides if the energy it creates is channeled constructively, so Pollux should not always be considered as unhelpful. The star badly place could manifest that way, not by the native misusing his energy but by others deceiving him and fate playing him some cruel tricks. Helper if in peril on voyages at sea. [Fixed Stars and Their Interpretation, Elsbeth Ebertin, 1928, p.41.]

Sun conjunct Pollux: Occult and theosophical interests, blows, stabs, serious accidents, shooting, shipwreck, murderer or murdered, extreme sickness and diseases, fevers, ailments affecting the stomach, homosexual, riches and honor but final ruin, blindness, injuries to head and face, quarrels, rape committed or suffered, banishment, imprisonment for embezzling, violent death, decapitation.

Jupiter conjunct Pollux: Legal losses, high position but danger of disgrace, trouble through relatives, banishment or imprisonment.

Neptune conjunct Vega: Timid, fond of music, occult interests, practical and scientific mind, associated with occult societies, material success, home may be broken up, liable to accidents, natural death in old age especially when Mars is in favorable aspect. [1] A tendency for occult and mysticism may be given. [3]

Of course i understand you need a conjunction, well all of these are within orb.
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May 1, 2019 at 10:14
(Taurus) » Liquidized.Mind.LM3992
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:
Fixed star Mesarthim, γ Arietis, is a word meaning Ministers (in old Hebrew) and it is noteworthy that Ptolemy gave this near neighbor of the other two the same planetary simile in opposite order: Saturn-Mars. Our astrology here must take on pin-point accuracy but the implication is that Mesarthim shows up more of the protective-administrative quality, less of the impulsive aggressive of Hamal and Sheratan. [2]

Mesarthim and Sheratan are in the horns of the Ram. They have a spectra that would indicate a Venusian nature. Mesarthim marked the beginning of Aries, and the vernal equinox in the days of Hipparchos when the twelve signs of the zodiac were finally given their present designation. [3]

Moon conjunct. Within orb.

Fixed star Hamal, Alpha Areitis, is a 2.0 magnitude yellow star on the forehead of the Ram, Aries Constellation the Ram. The traditional name Hamal derives from the Arabic راس الحمل (rās al-ħamal) which means head of the ram.

Hamal is a giant star that may host an orbiting planet with a mass greater than Jupiter. Between 2000 and 100 BC, the apparent path of the Sun through the Earth’s sky placed it in Aries at the northern vernal equinox, the point in time marking the start of spring in the Northern Hemisphere. This is why most astrology columns in modern newspapers begin with Aries. While the vernal equinox has moved to Pisces since then due to precession of the equinoxes, Hamal has remained in mind as a bright star near what was apparently an important place when people first studied the night sky.[1]

A yellow star situated in the forehead of the Ram and commonly known as the ram’s Following Horn. From Al Hamal, the Sheep. Symbolically called the Death Wound and often incorrectly named El Nath. [2]

Moon conjunct.

Moon conjunct Hamal: Patient, slow success through hard work, trouble through love affairs but favorable for marriage, marriage partner gains by business or speculation. [1]

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May 1, 2019 at 10:32
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:
Sheratan is conjunct Moon & Mars, my temper is amazingly nasty, well at least it was.

Mars conjunct Sheratan: This causes inflammation of the throat area, particularly the tonsils. they would experience severe inflammations and infections connected with the tonsils, far more often than would be considered normal. These are persons who would develop blisters and swollen tonsils, and would try surgery to correct the problem. This would not correct the problem since it would manifest in other areas, such as tremors, high fevers and other malfunctions. Alleviation of this imbalance could be found through spiritual means which could neutralize this negative energy, it would not be easy nor would it be rapid, but Self-love is the key here. In order to love others, they must love themselves; and in order to love self, they must find what they most dislike about themselves. [6] Muhammad Ali 0°06′, Celine Dion 1°30′


Sheratan, at 03°58′ Taurus, is the second brightest star in Aries. If prominent in a horoscope it can indicate violence, defeat, accidents, injury, danger, and honors. Mohammad Ali´s horoscope has Mars in Taurus conjunct both Sheratan and Mesarthim.

Read more at…

Moon is 0 degree´s, there is no description, on top of the tight Moon & Mars conjunction.
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May 1, 2019 at 11:08
System message: Post has been written by user Liquidized.Mind.LM3992, who already deleted profile on this website:
Moon 0 degrees conjunct ashvini.

Mars 1 degree.

The very first Nakshtra is “Ashvini” which relates to the very initial beginning of life where one is basically dependent for survival. This is in the 0.00 degree to 13D (degree) 20M (minute) in Aries sign. Ashvini is the beginning of everything and it represented by two stars in the constellation of Aries rashi and it is ruled by Ketu, so it has Ketu’s energies. These two stars appear similar more like that of horse head on a female body. Because horse is seen as a symbol of power and courage and its head signifies eagerness to take actions with swiftness. So Ashvini Nakshtra has combination of these two traits in its qualities.

Head of every human being relates to brain that controls all body functions. Accordingly, Ashvini Nakshtra relates to mental impulses and leadership qualities in good ways. Ashvini Nakshtra’s physical impact promotes marital harmony to aid childbirth. So if in any native’s horoscope 5th house and 9th house lord or even Jupiter planet is posited in Ashvini Nakshtra, it is good indicator that such person will not have any sexual disorder. Due to its vitality, person whose lagan sign is in Ashvini Nakshtra or lagan lord is in Ashvini Nakshtra will look younger than his age Ashvini Nakshtra can also be considered as a Nakshtra that is remover of obstacles.

Ashvini is a moveable Nakshtra so natives with prominent Ashvini like travelling and changes in life. They do not think twice before assigning a moveable disposition in mental or physical plane. Ketu is lord of this Nakshtra which relates to all types of beginnings in life, it holds and represents power of past, so natives with strong Ashvini influence can be very good healers.

People with prominent Ashvini Nakshtra in their horoscopes put their thoughts in to actions and generally become successful in their endeavors. When Ashvini is rising in the ascendant, it makes such native appear youthful and age doesn’t catches on their face quickly, native is courageous, charming and athletic generally. They are helpful in short term things mainly as they have urge to move on quickly in every field.

Ashvini is a male Nakshtra and such native cannot work under anyone easily as they can be very stubborn and unyielding type person and consequently they are more likely not to take benefits of any good counsel. They are straightforward, dress well and conscious of maintaining their health. Ashvini natives have great initiative, say more than any other single Nakshtra, so natives with prominent Ashvini can become successful business persons and leaders

Main body parts those are ruled by this Nakshtra are top portion of feet till knees. We know that knees provide us capability for walking, running and jumping, so natives with strong Ashvini influence can be good athletes.

The first charan of Ashvini Nakshtra falls in Aries Navmasa which is ruled by Mars planet and this infuses courage and initiative qualities with abundant energy.

The second charan of Ashvini Nakshtra falls in Taurus Navmasa which is ruled by Venus planet that makes native more graceful, more practical and resourceful in life.

The third charan of Ashvini Nakshtra falls in Gemini Navmasa which is ruled by Mercury planet that makes native good communicators, humorous and quick & bold decision maker.

The fourth charan of Ashvini Nakshtra falls in Cancer Navmasa makes native more sympathetic, conscious of understanding others needs and a kind of healer.

Professions and business lines those are more favorable for Ashvini Nakshtra natives are generally jobs in Law enforcement agencies, armed forces, Engineering, athletic & sports related jobs and businesses. Also good for Goldsmith, small businesses or shopkeepers, Physicians, Therapists, Chemists and Surgeons.

Whenever Sun, Mars and Ketu planets are posited in Ashvini Nakshtra, these planets gives very good results.

Moon in Ashvini Nakshtra generally gives youthful appearance, good manners and intelligence. Such natives are fashionable and conscious of their personality.

Mercury, Jupiter, Venus and Rahu also do good when posited in Ashvini Nakshtra.

If any native is suffering bad effects due to the affliction of Ashvini Nakshtra, “Lord Ganesh” worship is the best remedy, also wearing various shades of Red color.
July 5, 2019 at 15:59
System message: Post has been written by user Vanille, who already deleted profile on this website:
Omg that part about the gerbil made me cry so hard...

We can´t be friends anymore sorry I just can´t handle this, well you´re gone anyway but in case you return: stay the fuck away from me.

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