Unrequited love - can you see why?

November 24, 2022 at 21:25 (UT/GMT)
(Virgo) LotusStar
Unrequited love - can you see why?
I finally met a guy I like so much, and he ghosted...

He tried to sleep with me (on the first date) and I said no. I told him I like him a lot. He said we hit it off. But when he realized I was serious about asking him to leave (not spend the night) I don´t know if he felt rejected or something but he went cold. I went further with him than I normally do on a first date.. and I feel so f-cked up since this encounter.

I seriously felt almost dizzy for 2 days after we met, couldn´t get him out of my system.

I don´t get why he said he hit it off, he was clearly attracted to me too and he´s been silent since. I don´t think I should be making the first move... I feel like I let him know I like him and if he doesn´t ask me out again then it means he doesn´t feel it. Call me old school but I feel like its not too much to ask. Am I missing something here?

I asked a male friend and he said this guy´s probably a player and just wanted to get laid and he thought I´m too much work for it and he doesn´t wanna put in the work, wants something easier.


I asked my tarot cards how he feels and they keep showing me the 3 of swords. I guess that hes hurt?

I don´t get it, can a guy seriously feel that rejected just cos someone didn´t wanna sleep with them on a 1st date, is that such an unreasonable expectation? I guess in this day and age I shouldn´t wonder...

He said for him sex is very important and sexual chemistry. I get that. He´s a Scorpio Moon, I get that. But still, like, can you give me a fking second?

We have Moon conjunct Pluto and his Mars in my 8th house. My Lilith squares his Moon, his Lilith squares my Mars. His Sun is opposite my Moon.

This one stings, bad. :(
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November 24, 2022 at 21:31
(Virgo) LotusStar
Synastry
November 24, 2022 at 21:33
(Taurus) Morena_Lu
He is hurt..he didn´t get sex, I can understand him. He thought it will be easy, mostly girls chase men today(unfortunately).

You are 35, by now.. I think you understand what his behaviour means. He didn´t get you on a first date and he is angry? He did you a favour, go to some church and light some candle for his health.

He would not call at all, sex or not, because if he cared..he would not act like this..like a total jerk.
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November 24, 2022 at 21:44
(Virgo) LotusStar » Morena_Lu
I´m 35 but clearly dense when it comes to love.

I don´t get why he is so hurt or rejected when I clearly told him, and also showed him, that I liked him, and we even talked about seeing each other again. I´m a Virgo, I´m sorry, call me uptight but I can´t act like a Sagittarius, like no fux given, just go for it...

I know he probably did me a favor cos I can´t expect a guy to treat me this way, make me chase him. I just don´t do that. I have too much pride. And I don´t want this to be the dynamic, where he expect me to hand him everything on a silver platter.

I read for Scorpio Moon, sexual rejection can sting worse than most. But to me, that wasn´t rejection but just asking to slow down.


He did this before. Before we´d met. He went silent, I ended up reaching out as I kept getting intrusive thoughts and even had a dream about him... and it turned out he´d been walking in my neighborhood the day before and thinking about me.

Yeah I guess he did me a favor..

I wish I could forget him. It´s rough. I still like him, a lot😓 and this is probably really stupid. It´s not like it was just physical, we had a mental connection too, to a degree...

I know I have to let it go. He´s either too stubborn/prideful or he didn´t like me the same way and either case, I lose.
November 24, 2022 at 21:52
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » LotusStar
It was sacrasm... :61:

Girl, you did good, how would you feel if he just slept with you and never called you again? Or, he will call you to get more of what he already had.

Is that some great love we are hoping to find one day? Not really. He had some basic instinct...you refused him..it is over. Just move on.

Sagittarius and Scorpio in combination...I would not expect some romantic evening, flowers, moonlight..he probably wanted to see if you are desperate..like, she will not refuse me attitude. You are Virgo girl...I know you are not like that.
Sorry if I am raw...but I like to say openly things to others..it is just my way. Wish you to find some honest man, who is not just into one thing..and I believe some good men are around us, if we want to give them some chance. :37:
November 24, 2022 at 21:54
(Virgo) LotusStar
His Moon is conjunct my Pluto.. apparently I´m supposed to have the power? Nope..What a joke. 😅 he´s living rent free in my head.
November 24, 2022 at 22:06
(Virgo) LotusStar » Morena_Lu
No I want to hear it. :79: :74: I really do. And I appreciate a lot you saying it raw cos I don´t want it sugar coated. I need to get over this guy.

"Girl, you did good, how would you feel if he just slept with you and never called you again? Or, he will call you to get more of what he already had."

Yep 😓

That´s what I was thinking too. If it hurt this bad him ghosting me after what we had, I would have been devastated if it had been more.

"Sagittarius and Scorpio in combination...I would not expect some romantic evening, flowers, moonlight..he probably wanted to see if you are desperate..like, she will not refuse me attitude"

True and he´s had it before, getting it easy. He knows he is "good" let´s say.. at what he does, he kinda boasted about it too, lol.. his Leo Rising and all..

He also mentioned he is very jealous and possessive in a relationship and has abandonment issues, he verbatim said that.. and that he doesn´t wanna get involved too deep unless it´s really something worth it. So I guess he didn´t feel this was then... We have a composite stellium in Scorpio, including an exact Pluto/Venus conjunction. I felt there could be something deep there... but seems he doesn´t wanna go there. He wants to stick to his 5th house Sagittarius Sun shtick, love em and leave em thing I guess.

I´m trying to fight the urge to send him some psychic energy until he caves and I feel he may be doing it too. But this is probably a waste of time and energy.. he´d probably win at it anyway.

Thank you Morena..
November 24, 2022 at 22:14
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » LotusStar
I just think he thought - I am some bad boy, alpha style man, she will be all over me till the end of this night..Yup..if she was 18-22 years old girl that is into trying sex on some parking lot.... ridiculous.


I would not send him anything. Actually, I would not go on a date with that kind of person to be honest. I just sense them..that type. Their story in short- They loved some girl for real, she broke their heart and now they can only f... you, they can´t give you nothing real..poor them. They watched 365 days or Fifty shades of grey a lot. And you should beg them....to do that to you...right....
November 24, 2022 at 22:16
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » LotusStar
You will be ok, you will see. :79:
YouTube
YouTube
November 24, 2022 at 22:23
(Virgo) LotusStar » Morena_Lu
"Their story in short- They loved some girl for real, she broke their heart and now they can only f... you, they can´t give you nothing real..poor them. They watched 365 days or Fifty shades of grey a lot. And you should beg them....to do that to you...right...."

Girl. 👀😶😳

Yes...exact this. I don´t know if he´s watched the movie but he was acting the type for sure. And all the rest of it.

He missed out on a pretty awesome composite we shared. It could have been deep I think, if he allowed it. It felt deep, I can´t be the only one who felt it... but his hearts closed or something or I must be really naive.

At my age, embarrassing. I just felt something I don´t feel often, actually, rarely if at all. Why for this guy out of all of them I don´t know, the astrology at work maybe... but we had too many squares at the end of the day, Sun, ascendant, Mercury, Mars... battle of wills all the way.
November 24, 2022 at 22:28
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » LotusStar
That movie is a total crap and disaster, just like 365 ...You need to have low IQ to watch both of them till the end..I couldn´t, I just skipped.

Send him this one.. :4:

https://youtu.be/T7zFN4oYjJw
YouTube
YouTube
November 24, 2022 at 22:33
(Virgo) LotusStar » Morena_Lu
:61: :61:
November 24, 2022 at 22:39
ASTRASTRO-SEEK ADMINSEEK Admin, (Taurus) Petr9
We have Moon conjunct pluto and his Mars in my 8th house. My Lilith squares his Moon, his Lilith squares my Mars.
===

Enjoy your intense power gameplays!

Lots of people could envy you! 😝
November 24, 2022 at 22:57
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » Petr9
:61: :61:
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November 24, 2022 at 23:05
(Virgo) LotusStar » Petr9
Honestly, the cringe factor of all this is not lost on me 👀😓


I finally find the guy who makes me wanna stop swiping and of course we have a toxic synastry...🥴

I´m pretty sure his natal Moon/Pluto in Scorpio got the Phd in power games, he´s got it down to a science. I am gonna bow out... but quietly, I´m not gonna let him know he won.
November 24, 2022 at 23:17
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » LotusStar
Would you be his friend if you didn´t like him physically..and why?

What do you like in his attitude, personality?

Think more about him as a person, not just as some hot offer you would not refuse if he was smart enough to play for some time with you and wait for candy..but obviously he didn´t want to invest in you his time and money. Why would you wait and want that kind of person?
.......

Or...if you are really that much into him..just have sex with him, maybe he is not that good as he is talking around :61: You can be Christian Grey ..use him :4:
November 24, 2022 at 23:17
(Leo) plumreme
To me, this is as simple as it gets: You have different relational expectations. He just wants sex (that´s okay); You want more than sex (that´s okay). Mismatched goals.

I wonder if either of you were upfront and transparent about what you´re each looking for? Sounds like maybe, at least he, was not. that sucks. My guess would be that he´s not offended as much as he´s just not wanting to waste his time with someone who wants more than quick/easy sex.

You set a boundary, per your reasonable standards. You don´t need to worry about whether your standard is reasonable to someone else - it´s yours, and you get to decide your own standards and comfort. That´s also a boundary that weeds out ppl who just want sex. Probably good to weed those guys out if that´s not what you want.

A+ gatekeeping on your part! . You got really good information (on both him and you) - either your goals aren´t aligned (in which case compatibility and chemistry mean little to nothing), or this is someone who does not like to hear "no" and is weeding out people he can´t easily control or who will require effort from him. That sounds like a major drag for whoever fucks with him.

I wonder why he left such a sting? My guess is that´s more about you, and it´s time to dig. and then try try again with someone whose goals are more aligned with yours.
November 24, 2022 at 23:31
(Virgo) LotusStar » Morena_Lu
Would you be his friend if you didn´t like him physically..and why?

What do you like in his attitude, personality?

-- ok this is really helpful exercise 😅 --

No it wasn´t anything super his personality... but there was little things. We had good conversations (his Venus in my 3rd) he had some interesting things to say like general knowledge type (which my Gemini Moon likes). We had some banter but yes mostly it was physical. Very strong, especially for just meeting a person. Best kisses of my life, hands down...

"But obviously he didn´t want to invest in you his time and money. Why would you wait and want that kind of person?"

Stings... but yeah, I need to hear it.

" maybe he is not that good as he is talking around :61: You can be Christian Grey ..use him :4:"

Honestly based off the preview I think he is. :61: but I won´t because I caught feels already and I wouldn be able to separate my feelings. I´d constantly be hoping he falls in love with me.
November 24, 2022 at 23:38
(Leo) hermitfaerie » Morena_Lu
This, 100
November 24, 2022 at 23:39
(Virgo) Aren Levi
You did not comunicate 2 days after first date ? :4:
That sounds like childish game of ignoring each other to get attention and make the other chase ...

If he did not communicate since the date, then he either play games or is already hanging out with someone else, or even balls deep in someone else.

Tarot cards showed your emotions since your energy is all over it.

Move on and if he comes back then tell him sex only after 5th date and see his reaction :61:

This whole situation smells like chemistry and not love.

:37:
November 24, 2022 at 23:45
(Virgo) LotusStar » plumreme
"I wonder if either of you were upfront and transparent about what you´re each looking for? Sounds like maybe, at least he, was not. that sucks. My guess would be that he´s not offended as much as he´s just not wanting to waste his time with someone who wants more than quick/easy sex."

Thank you... yeah thats the only conclusion I end up drawing too. I guess he was kind of vague. We both said we´re working on personal goals right now that is a focus but open to relationship. I told him I am not in a rush but looking for something that has long term potential. I definitely didn´t think he was just looking to get laid or I wouldn´t have met him. His job situation is not great atm, he´s looking to leave his place and not fulfilled and I know thats his priority. I thought it´s fine we can hang out and see how it goes. He said he wants to help me be my best etc... he said really good things. But somehow when we met it became all about sex or nothing. It´s confusing.

"I wonder why he left such a sting? My guess is that´s more about you, and it´s time to dig. and then try try again with someone whose goals are more aligned with yours."

I think it was the synastry. The chemistry was very good. It takes me wayyy longer to get comfortable with someone normally. I don´t know if it was moon/Pluto or what but was and felt very intimate right from the start. I had reached out to him later that night and we both said we had fun and then he never said anything else or asked to see me again. I thought we would build on that.
November 24, 2022 at 23:47
(Pisces) Mamalina
Im 100% sure he was only interested in a friends with benefits type of relationship with you. So any indication you are giving him that you like him in a romantic way doesnt really matter because he was not interested in that. Probably why he went cold. I think you should give up on this guy because it seems obvious he only wanted to have sex. Maybe its time you accept it and stop trying to make it more complicated. He was interested in having sex with you and thats all.
November 24, 2022 at 23:49
(Leo) Zephyrin
Glad you put a boy in his place who thinks no girl can reject him.

8H synastries tend to be problematic. Pluto-Moon conjunct could make things harder. It does not always bring an healthy obsession.

Also harsh Mars-Lilith aspects may show a kind of power struggle and sexual tension. Trines are hardy either.

If I met the type of guy you have mentioned -and I already did-, I would put my feelings aside, get laid and never call him back before he does. Because if you don´t dare to be self-seeker or evil more than they are, those guys will drain you. This is not an advice but at least you don´t get harmed much, and it usually makes them mad.
November 25, 2022 at 00:00
(Virgo) LotusStar » Aren Levi
"You did not comunicate 2 days after first date ? :4:
That sounds like childish game of ignoring each other to get attention and make the other chase ...

If he did not communicate since the date, then he either play games or is already hanging out with someone else, or even balls deep in someone else."

I messaged him the same night, we both said we had fun. He asked me first if I I did and I said yes. But he didn´t ask to see me again. And I´m not about to ask his ass out on top of it. So. Yeah... either at a stanstill or youre right and he is balls deep in someone else already and I´m here making a fool of myself pining for him. 😅

"Move on and if he comes back then tell him sex only after 5th date and see his reaction :61:"

🙌 yup..

If he ever comes back, which I highly doubt, he has some explaining to do.
November 25, 2022 at 00:12
(Virgo) LotusStar » Zephyrin
"If I met the type of guy you have mentioned -and I already did-, I would put my feelings aside and be the one who gets laid and never call back before he does. Because if you don´t dare to be self-seeker or evil more than they are, those guys will drain you. This is not an advice but at least you don´t get harmed much, and it usually makes them mad."

Omg. I love this :61: :79:

I hope one day I can level up to this kinda Leo energy in my life.

Yeah more I think about it, he´s probably shocked I could refuse him. Although I did tell him I like him.

I was too shy for him probably, his Lilith is in Sagittarius.. I dont have it in me to be that girl.

I wanted to fall in love and I felt I could fall in love with him. But yeah... he didn´t want I guess.
November 25, 2022 at 00:14
ASTRASTRO-SEEK ADMINSEEK Admin, (Taurus) Petr9 » LotusStar
I finally find the guy who makes me wanna stop swiping and of course we have a super toxic synastry...🥴
===

That´s life :32:
Posts: 1-25 26-50 51-64
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