What makes a good mother?

September 20, 2021 at 17:57 (UT/GMT)
(Sagittarius) Cosmette
What makes a good mother?
My mother and I notoriously have a difficult relationship with one another. Growing up, I raised her and was lacking in a childhood of my own, while she lived out hers as an adult. Our synastry is an unsurprising one, 4th stellium for both of us, 7th overlay, etc.
It´s interesting, since her own mother also was not the most loving towards her and placed a lot of responsibility in her lap as the eldest child. I thought it was odd, my grandmother after all was a Cancer sun, she cooked, she kept a beautiful home, had 3 beautiful kids, but seemed to not be very motherly towards her kids, and quarrelsome with her husband. My mother was fated to be a bit similar in that way, it seems, but different.
Being a Cancer moon myself, but with an afflicted 4th house, and a loaded 5th, and an ambiguous attitude towards having children, I´m not sure what to make of motherhood. There´s its perks, and pitfalls, but the concept is special, but has left me quizzical.
If Cancer is known as mother, but Cancer isn´t being motherly, then it´s safe to say so much more goes into what makes a man or woman a great "mom".

What aspects create a nurturing disposition? What zodiac do we see that surprises us? What elements or patterns are there? With my Scorpio/Aqua mom not being entirely the most warm to me growing up, I found often that Leo and Aries mothers of my friends were so incredibly nurturing to me and their kids. I always assumed perhaps that we got along since we trined as elements, but it seems they also adored their Taurus and Pisces kids. Sure, we have our squares, oppositions, where we can´t see eye to eye, yet... something was different.

Sure, as logical adults nowadays, we can chalk it up to someone being immature, selfish, and unprepared for motherhood because of xyz reasons. But, as astrologers, I think it´d be interesting to hear what others felt.

Is there anyone you know who makes an amazing mother in your eyes? Is there anything in their chart that makes you go "Ooooh, that makes sense."
Is there someone you know who isn´t a very nurturing person with motherly aspects? Is there someone who doesn´t have motherly aspects who surprises you with a caring nurturing side?

Let me know what you think! :^)

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September 20, 2021 at 18:24
(Virgo) astreo
I have Jupiter at house 4.

I can affirm that my mother is a type of "blessing" for me, she always supports me in everything I need, I have never felt alone and, whenever I need whatever, there she is, she is very overprotective, although, it is somewhat moralistic, has a system of beliefs, values and philosophy of life with high standards.

I also have Saturn in the 4th house, so it´s not all great either.

She is from the sign of Capricorn, just making conjunction to my Ascendant and trine to my Saturn in Taurus, so, I can presume that I am her favorite child of all.

In our composite chart, I have Jupiter in Cancer in the 4th house, another thing that reaffirms it.
September 20, 2021 at 18:51
(Sagittarius) Cosmette » astreo
I love this response! That´s amazing, and also I´m very happy to hear you have such a good thing going there, it´s incredible that together you guys have a composite exalted jupiter and in the domicile zodiac house... that´s amazing. It´s interesting to hear your perspective as well on the aspects and how it translates to your relationship with her, your contacts are great for the relationship you both have as family! :^0
September 21, 2021 at 02:58
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com
System message: Post has been written by user Nechepso, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Does your mother´s moon have negative aspect with other planets? There seems to be a glitch with your mother´s moon as it also signifies the mind in the birth chart. You said "her Scorpio/Aquarius" may indicate both luminaries are squared, which is not a good sign indeed.
September 21, 2021 at 04:46
(Virgo) astreo » Jaided
My mother has a stellium at house 5 and she is a great mother, somewhat overprotective, but very maternal, she loves children. I think she wanted to be a children´s educator.
September 21, 2021 at 07:23
(Virgo) Etherealmind
My mother has her Cancer Moon opposite his Jupiter conjunct Saturn in Capricorn.

So she´s between : tenderness/emotional, likes baby animals, cats, she can cry easily when she sees, read or listen to smth moving/touching

AND

strictness/realism almost pessimism with her Capricorn placements lol. I think that she should learn to combine these 2 sides better as it´s often EITHER ONE (Moon) OR THE OTHER (Saturn) lol but I know when she´s in her moon mood and when it´s her Saturn talking to me when she´s becoming pessimistic/realistic lol and I could achieve great things thanks to her cause she never lied to me about reality of life.

So I think that every mom should have something about Saturn in their chart. NOT TOO MUCH OF COURSE cause it can be suffocating and simply too much but a bit of Saturn aspects in the chart can give realism in the decisions for you AND THE FAMILY, discipline and being aware of what you do with and for your family.

My mother avoided many mistakes compared other people thanks to this Saturn conj. Jupiter and opposite Moon.
September 21, 2021 at 13:13
(Scorpio) SpaceChild » Nechepso
My Scorpio sun Aqua moon are squared... I don´t feel like a good mom. I feel like I am repeating my mothers qualities every now and then. I try my best.

I haven´t done synastry too much between my mother and myself though, so unsure of any aspects there. Or me and my daughter actually, I might look into this today.

-SC
September 21, 2021 at 13:18
(Taurus) nutelina » Etherealmind
Thats so cool you know that.
To all of you, some or who already know, I had a very unhappy relationship with my mom after I became more self aware and critical of her. But before we were inseparable. Classic narcissist by the texbook. Her mother probay too.
She is Cancer rising like me and my first born, all cancer. Nurture for a 100%, maybe max of all but also very sensitive so prone to hysterical fitts all of a sudden. And cancer moon! Let me take my gloves on first. Fire and water is definitely boiling water vapour nasty. First it is gentle then ouch!
September 21, 2021 at 14:27
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com » SpaceChild
System message: Post has been written by user Nechepso, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Since you are already know this aspect and its qualities, you have a free will to decide. I just don´t believe about mumbo-jumbo yogas to which many indian astrologers has been suggesting if you wish to turn our weakness/bad omens into good. Just pray and ask for God´s providence/grace. I´m talking about God of the christians.
September 21, 2021 at 17:10
(Sagittarius) Cosmette » Nechepso
Oh man- it has a lot going on. She´s got a Scorpio stellium in her sun, mercury, venus, neptune, then Virgo mars, uranus and pluto, a south node conjuncting her stellium, and an opposition with her Aqua moon and her jupiter/ascendant, and the virgo stellium in opposition to her saturn in Pisces. Her moon does square her mercury, and her neptune, but it doesn´t make any other contacts there. She actually has an incredibly active chart, everything else conjuncts, trines (22 or 25 times, something like that) and a good bit of sextiles, but way more oppositions. There´s also her Leo ascendant, so there´s a whole lot going on with everything being so close in degrees, too. She´s so smart, so intelligent, but has a mean/competitive streak and I notice a bit of a tendency to exaggerate, and see things from a distorted viewpoint. Her pluto squares my sun, her sun squares my north node exactly- but the list of squares is insane. She and I have one loving aspect, I think? She´s a complicated woman, I won´t say a bad woman, but we could never live together without the house exploding, I think. Years of me having to mother her, and years of her not being there to mother me, I think the inauspicious synastry (I forgot to mention her stellium conjuncts my chiron in 4th :^/) and events that have occurred have built resentment brick by brick.
September 21, 2021 at 17:14
(Sagittarius) Cosmette » SpaceChild
All you can do is try! Motherhood unfortunately doesn´t come with a manual, wish it did, but it´s awesome that you´re looking into your synastry, since it´s a roadmap to our potential with the partner of the chart, Scorpio sun Aqua moon makes a smart and savvy woman, and the fact you care to try is more than what any child could ask for. Support her and let her know that you´re proud of her :^)
September 21, 2021 at 17:24
(Sagittarius) Cosmette » Jaided
That´s awesome and means the world to hear! I wonder, given that someone else also commented about 5th house, that perhaps there´s something there. Leo does rule children in the 5th, and perhaps that gives us an edge as potential parents haha- my mom had a 4th stellium so her qualities I figured would have been more Cancerean, but they were malefic, and I think made her Cancerean qualities lesser.
I know some Capricorn women, and I find that they can be great parents, someone once explained to me that Capricorn was the "dad of the zodiac" whereas Cancer was "mom of the zodiac", both have paternal qualities and perhaps one may be more serious and saturnian, but a parent is saturnian. I don´t think I´d mind having a Capricorn father or mother at all, actually, and with your earthy big 3 and lovely Taurus moon, I think you have a very calm and stable energy to provide for a child like they deserve, with a 5th stellium to have fun and be creative. You´re an awesome mom, I believe it, 10000%
September 22, 2021 at 19:16
(Sagittarius) Ioaanaa08 » Jaided
Why i resonate so much with what you wrote ?
I´m not a mom but i feel like my brothers are my kids 🥺
September 27, 2021 at 23:48
(Capricorn) Emanuel
"My mother and I notoriously have a difficult relationship with one another. "

For someone with Moon in Cancer in the Whole Sign 12th house and in a square with Mars.... Understandable.
September 29, 2021 at 09:40
(Leo) Northerneuropean
In my natal chart, I have:
:152:in :174:
I don´t know why so, but my dad is Cancer Sun, My mom - aries Sun.
:152: :192: :157:
:152: :191:MC
My mom was very careeristic. She worked very hard. She earn more than my father. In principle, she was the head of the family and my moral benchmark, because my father was an alcoholic.
My mom was very busy and i didn´t see her much at home from the age of 7.

:157: :191:IC
:157: in 4th house
When mom was at home, she was very strict. We had to be very disciplined. I didn´t have a mom who give me peace. Rather, it was the father. Mom was strict, demanding and very authoritative.

But she was also very loving (sometimes), smart, with high morale standarts and very fair.
So may be thats why I have Jupiter in 29 degrees Cancer conjunct Venus in Leo conjunct SN.

But in later years I had a lot of disputes with my mom. I even came to aggression. It was all because she did not admit their mistakes what she said, even if she was wrong (sometimes).

I have :151: :194: :155: and :151: :194: :160:

But all my childhood I remembered these nice days when I was 3 to 7 years when my mom was at home and she was very kind, loving and caring. But these days are in the past.
I have :152: :192: :159: and :152: :192: :199:

My father sometimes judged me publicly.
I have :164: :191:MC in 10th house Cancer.

My :152: is in 9th house (my mother was very smart, wise).
My :151:, :154:, :156:, :162: are in 10th house.
(I have publicly known parents)

my :153: is in 11th house, :155: in 8th house.
:64:


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