Astrology and Parenting Style - Discussions, questions

fishscales » nikkia "Sadly, I witnessed a teammate break his neck on the trampoline. He went too high. Trying too hard."

Greek coach... Should´ve known the Icarus myth...

nikkia » fishscales Oh he got results! Trained the State Champ and 3 County champs... all vying for Nationals.
We were a small group of 10. So, yeah... this coach was THE MAN !
Sadly, I witnessed a teammate break his neck on the trampoline. He went too high. Trying too hard.

fishscales » nikkia Your coach sounds like he was kind of a "malaka"...

But he was trying to get results, and my guess is that he probably succeeded much of the time...that kind of approach works with some, but not with others...the athletic arena is someplace where it probably has a higher degree of success...

Gotta respect the fact that he was not trying to be "liked", but doing what he thought he needed to do to obtain the best possible performance out of his students...

The reason Sensei whacked us was different though... He wouldn´t do it to try to illicit better performance, but to change our mindset and perspective...

"Why are you letting your guard down when someone is in your immediate vicinity holding a sword? Don´t be paranoid, but always be vigilant" is what I think he was trying to say...

He was actually rather patient with mechanics... But still faint with praise...

nikkia My style: discipline, humor, love, freedom.
I really don´t see my parent´s parenting styles in my chart..

QUESTION: So, which house is ´having kids´ house?
If the 5th is creation/ being childlike... the 8th is sex /legacy (kids are legacy)... do you look at both?

Fish & Venus:

I had a gymnastics coach (a Greek guy) who used a long hollow plastic bat to whack us while we were on the parallel bars, vault horse, and he was especially brutal while we tumbled on the floor.
Screaming FASTER! HIGHER! FASTER! HIGHER!

He´d hit the back our legs so loud it echoed throughout the arena.

As if the balance beam isn´t nerve-wrecking enough, he´d stand by whacking at our feet if they weren´t in perfect position, or at our sides if our spine wasn´t straight.
Good thing he really couldn´t hit us while did our tricks on the beam.. or while we were in the air- it was way too high for him to reach..lol.. But he´d get us on the way down if we weren´t perfectly formed.

No matter how perfect anyone´s routine was - he gave zero approval or praise. You just knew you did well when you did NOT get whacked and screamed at.

Truth be told - Although I loved the sport.... I didn´t much care for that man.

_Moon_Queen_ I think that all depend on ch/par syanastry and composite.
You can be authority as hell but if you have nice, friendly syanastry or composite with your child he will never see you as authority...and vice versa...
You can be warm, kind, emotional person but if your Saturn squares child´s Mars or similar, he will be scared of you.

IIyyaarr13 My biological father and I both had in ; He was like "the peer" I was most consistently in touch with. The aspect leaves a strong impression of social reality that is lighter for those with Saturn in the other signs.
You would think some mellowness would be possible from my mother with , however she was born with a Tee- involving sign ! She was not the Moon for very long! She shook off that role for being similar to her father who was tough on her.
The childhood step-father had and was a "guest" for 9 1/2 years; Did not see any need to make me the "darling prince" that he had been as a child!
The degree my Saturn is at relates to anarchy and the stage which puts an interesting twist on "discipline"

Nola_la » fishscales "Not so much pregnancy Nola, but creation...generation...

That´s why it´s associated with art and creativity, and all that stuff...

As for creativity...pregnancy and birth are pretty much the apex of human creativity aren´t they?"

Ok, I get it, thanks

venushouse » fishscales Oh my gosh! Sounds like a movie. Your Sensei meant serious business! but great because the enemy isn´t going to use good manners when attacking you, it would be unexpected!

Ah a Sag so dreamy... I know what you mean, I do appreciate the strengths my parents had. My father was very successful and my mother did start me off on the piano. I always was provided for even though it was through duty and not an expression of love. I was provided for none the less.

I think these experiences make us even more diligent in not repeating these things and sort of steadfast which might not have been as evident in the first place had we had an idyllic experience.

It´s another reason I am amazed by the potential we each have, it´s our choice how it will play out.

fishscales » venushouse "Tapping my fingers with a wooden stick instead of verbalizing."

Lol. Sensei had a wooden katana that he´d walk around the mat with...Sometimes he´d hit us in the back of the knees with it hard enough to take our legs out from under us..."when someone with a sword is close to you, you should pay attention to what they´re doing"

I get the absence part of things... My dad was a Sag... Always somewhere else, mentally and physically...not cut out to be a "classical parent" I guess...

I eventually came to terms with it, and learned how to appreciate him for who he was in the process...took me a while though...

venushouse » fishscales Judo is awesome! I have always admired martial arts but because I am a pianist I don´t dare take the chance on my fingers. My brother is a black belt in Karate and I loved going to the tournaments.

Your sensei sounds like my first piano teacher lol. Tapping my fingers with a wooden stick instead of verbalizing. Your kids are lucky to have a father who is willing to personalize their parenting accordingly. One size does not fit all but I am sure your early experiences for better or worse prepared you to be the best father for your kids.

My Aries father was physically absent after their divorce by the time I was 7 , though always emotionally absent and self serving and mother though present was cold and disciplined, emotionally unavailable, the coldest leo on record. When I think of the potential, the Sun in all it´s glory for my mother and the majestic god of war for my father.
I am sure you have extracted all the good that could be obtained from your childhood and added in the necessary extras. I am sure your Virgo daughter keeps you on your toes though with accountability

fishscales » venushouse "A good parent I think is coach, cheerleader and psychologist"

The cheerleader part is something I have been trying to work on...

I took Judo as a kid, and the instructor was very modest with praise... Sensei would either scowl or a barely-perceptible smile would cross his lips... He would mostly scowl though ... He would very rarely put praise into words. Anyway, this guy became a sort of father figure to me, since my dad wasn´t around at the time... I think it´s very possible my parenting style has been influenced by him...

I was the type of kid who could pick up on the subtle clues though... I could tell if Sensei was pleased or displeased, without him saying anything... Not all kids are like that though... My daughter isn´t like that as all... She´s a Virgo...wants confirmation... So I have been trying to be more vocal with praise...

venushouse » fishscales Fishscales, your birthday is a day before my husband´s birthday.

Did you say emotional self discipline? Yes I so agree We have been reading 7 habits of highly successful teens and another "self help" book. The insides must match the outsides or there will be a clash and you want your kids to be happy.

Discipline is absolutely emotional health and a healthy mind. I have a brilliant ,high achieving son who forever doubts himself and a lazy daughter who has endless potential. These issues always need to be addressed as well as offering some inspiration...

A good parent I think is coach, cheerleader and psychologist, lol amongst endless other things. Yes using the Venus side is definitely my favorite part as well. I wish it could be all Venus.. your kids are lucky to have you! and you are instilling valuable tools for life as well as fun!

fishscales » venushouse "Discipline discipline ,discipline"

"When work is done well we reap the rewards Venus conjunct Jupiter."

Pretty close to my style, for the most part.

For me, it´s probably more about inner discipline...

Trying to teach emotional self discipline to the kids has always been important to me... To stop and think before speaking/acting... Also to examine their own motivations and take others points of view and feelings into account...

"Just because you want to do it doesn´t mean you should do it" is something that comes up alot, either proactively, or looking back on a "bad" situation that´s already happened, and exploring other ways it could have been handled...

I expect alot of them, and I talk to them as if they were fellow adults...

I think they appreciate this, in the long run...

External discipline is important to me too though... When it´s time to do something, it´s time to do it...

I have moon trine Saturn and Pluto

Like you, I am Venus dominant and have a Venus/Jupiter trine... So it´s not all discipline and business... We all get to be "kids" together sometimes... That´s probably my favorite part...

We often get in trouble with my wife... As a unit...

RunnerChic85 For me as a mother, the moon is a big one for me. I have my moon in Libra, and this really resonates with me. I´m all about fairness, questioning whether I´m giving equal attention and effect on between my four kids. I can drive myself crazy and feel incredibly guilty if I feel like I´m not. I think having my moon in the 4th house makes this feeling even stronger.

I also have Pluto in the 4th house--Pluto is all about transformation. I did not have a happy childhood growing up. I don´t consider my dad a major part of my development, since he struggled a lot with addictions and was emotionally, and sometimes physically, absent. My mother (Gemini sun, Scorpio moon, don´t know the rest of her info)...I could literally write a book about her. She was the most controlling, two-faced, jealous, manipulative person I´ve met. She´d shelter me so much, but then constantly belittle and mock me, because I didn´t have friends, and she´d mock me to others in our small town. Because she was not happy with my dad, I became her little "project" and every thing I did was a reflection on her. My performance in a track meet was a reflection on her, and so were my grades in school, my physical appearance, my reputation, etc. her two favorite sayings are "Can´t you do anything right?" and "You´ll never amount to anything." Racing track and cross-country was my one outlet, I was very successful at it and it made me feel good about myself, but she took that all away as she made her affection of me conditional on my performance, and I began to base my self-worth on my performance as well. My dad saw all what was happening, and sat by, idly watching. I´m 34 years old now, and I´m still in the healing process. I still hear my mom´s voice in the background, mocking me, making me question everything about my self-worth.

Sorry, I got off an on tangent there, but I´m grateful Pluto is the planet of transformations. I am doing EVERYTHING in my power not to raise my kids in the same way she raised me. I can feel the tendency there, but I´m aware of it, and I ask my honest husband to keep me in check if I ever seem like I´m starting to go that route. I have my own issues of self-worth I´m dealing with, and somethimes when my kids struggle with something, my knee-jerk reaction is to blame myself and question my own worth as a mother and a human being, but I NEVER want to make my kids feel like my love and affection for them is conditional based on their performance in something.

I´ve hear about Saturn too and believe it has an impact. I have Saturn in the 5th house. Many look at this negatively, but for me, it has a positive spin. I take raising my children very seriously--I want them to grow up to be kind, happy human beings with big hearts. I´ve also heard the 5th house is tied the most to your oldest child...well, my oldest son is a Capricorn, and everything about him seems 100% true Capricorn 😀 He´s very meticulously, a math wiz, and keeps saying he wants to join the military. He´s lucky he´s an Aries rising--that will give him the drive to go far in life.

nutelina » fishscales Um the poor kids craving attention?

ram_goat » Luna Alba maybe both things... at the same time.

fishscales » Luna Alba I think there´s a romance novel about that relationship...

Luna Alba » fishscales Who´s the sneakyest and manages to fool the other? 😁

Just an idea...😇

fishscales » nutelina Did you say they will compete because they don´t complete?

Good one

What would two Pisces people compete about though?

Who can daydream harder?

MarvinReal Sun (personality, vitality, soul)
Moon (feeling, care, nurturing)
Saturn (touching everything)
5th house sign and ruler (children, playing, doing sport with kids)
Venus, Jupiter (love, affection, compassion, generosity)
Ascendant (it affects how do you behave and relate to kids all the time)
Mercury and Mars, both notorious for how you communicate and act towards them.

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I think it´s the same for a man (father) as well as for a woman (mother).

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I am not a father yet, so I can´t say. Check my chart and judge my parenting style.

venushouse Mars in Capricorn ascendant and Saturn and Aries in my 4th house. Discipline discipline ,discipline. I homeschool my 10 year old son and a 12 year old daughter. I rule my household like a loving dictator! When work is done well we reap the rewards Venus conjunct Jupiter. I am strict , serious but generous and loving with my abundance of Venus placements.

Luna Alba » ram_goat "I never watched 5 minutes of that show, but the images are iconic".


You make that 1%.
I watched all the seasons in 2017, due to friends´s pressure.

Interesting, but I didn´t get obsessed. There´s nothing who could make me obsessed in summer, except for the wrong guys and vacantions 😎.

Still haven´t seen the last season, though...




So who is more nurturing to their dragon children? 

Someone with moon in an air sign or fire sign?


Definetely fire. And a Leo Moon is in exaltation in this position 👑

ram_goat » Luna Alba I never watched 5 minutes of that show, but the images are iconic.

I thought she was a pisces, from only looking at her, turns out she´s scorp
in real life.

So who is more nurturing to their dragon children?

Someone with moon in an air sign or fire sign?

I think not a water moon.

Luna Alba » ram_goat Haha...mother of dragons

We are the same height, only I could be the Eastern European version 😎

Dracarys...

ram_goat » Luna Alba She told me I´ll probably be mother of boys, as I´m "not like her " -meaning I´m an authoritative figure.

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Or mother of...