This Girl Never Calls Me But Always Available When I Contact Her (16 Years) Why?

April 7, 2021 at 17:24 (UT/GMT)
(Leo) STPFan
This Girl Never Calls Me But Always Available When I Contact Her (16 Years) Why?
Is there a way to observe a natal chart? Composite chart? To find out the reason to this? Basically, the last 16 years or so... I will contact this girl out of the blue and she´s always eager, excited, and wanting to talk to me. She never delays me. She never has an excuse to not take my call. The issue is... she never calls me. She never contacts me first. She claims men should do the pursuing. But, I just know that she´s contacted other men directly and initially.

She has told me several times that she just enjoys it when I contact her. I sometimes say to myself does she have a fascination or want to be "mistress?" Because it´s just odd to me that she never calls me.

I´ve even told her lol will you please just call me and say hello. She says... I simply can´t do it. I can only describe her as attractive, introverted to a degree, sometimes shy, and also insecure. But, when we´re together she always tells me I can be myself and so "natural" in your presence. She said she doesn´t understand it.

The only thing I can think of is that she´s afraid of rejection from me? But, I don´t recall ever rejecting her. I´ve matched her intensity, vibe, feeling every single time. Maybe possibly she feels another woman is around me? And again... doesn´t want rejection? I don´t get it.

I can post her natal chart... my natal chart... and the composite chart if it helps? I don´t know what to look for. But, I´m intrigued to find out the reason to this.

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April 7, 2021 at 17:33
(Virgo) powerofuniverse
You should share your synastry chart (chart overlaying your birth chart and her birth chart) and maybe the composite chart too! It can help!
April 7, 2021 at 17:56
(Aries) nutelina
Yeah composite perhaps more synastry, some Moon Mercury interaction, Mars who knows.

I had to check if you weren´t like 22 :2: I have such ´friends´, I stopped calling if it´s a one way street, I want someone to also want me. I think Fire signs and guys in particular of course like to offer themselves to the ladies, we are always too excited to wait for anyone else to act. Fire signs are definitely actors, the fastest ones I would say.

Thinking about it, it might be opposition, I have a friend who is Scorpio but Aries moon, so I wondered, Sun opposite my moon, but her moon conjunct mine, like a kid and parent. The kids don´t call. :4:
April 7, 2021 at 18:11
(Taurus) s81
Can´t tell without looking at her chart too. But from what I see in your chart there are many possibilities.
Having Pluto in 1st you project strong power and may be she "feels" you as somewhat manipulative with her, having Neptune in 3rd you tend to have a not-so-clear communication and may be she sees you somewhat confusing, etc. Also having Mars conjunct Lilith you have to be very careful in the connection that conjunction has with her Sun, if your Mars (specially potentiated with your Lilith) steps over her Sun or is in a tense aspect with it, your will will tend to impose over her´s in any decision making that might arouse and that might no be comfortable for her, etc.
April 7, 2021 at 18:39
(Sagittarius) goldenlion32
I used to be the same way. I don´t like chasing after men. It´s really, conditioning of Religious/Spiritual beliefs. A lot of the Christian Dating books will tell you to allow the masculine to pursue you. Usually it weeds out the men who are not around long-term. :61:

If she´s INFJ/INFP personality type for example, you might just not want to deal with men or women who are the fast fire signs or the air who blows around in the wind.

Sounds perhaps she is looking for someone that sticks around.
April 7, 2021 at 19:23
(Taurus) Morena_Lu
"If you really want to do something, you´ll find a way. If you don´t, you´ll find an excuse.”

16 years...I think that it is obvious even without a chart, she is probably not into you.. :8:

I would move on, it is the best way..
Relationships require an equal amount of effort from both people.

Life is short..
We all deserve someone who will love us as much as we love them.:)
April 7, 2021 at 20:11
(Leo) STPFan
I will do my best to post the charts. This is my first time doing that. Hopefully I know what I´m doing. lol
April 7, 2021 at 20:24
(Aquarius) nikkia
I was raised not to call a man. Period.
My father pounded this in my head long before I even dreamed of dating a boy.

This ingrained behavior followed me into adulthood so much so that even living on my own and supporting myself, my fiancé questioned me about my never calling him first. I was unaware this was an issue ! :6:
April 7, 2021 at 20:28
(Leo) STPFan
Her Natal Chart
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April 7, 2021 at 20:31
(Leo) STPFan
Our Composite Chart
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April 7, 2021 at 20:32
(Leo) STPFan
Our Synastry Chart
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April 7, 2021 at 20:33
(Leo) STPFan
First time adding charts. If I messed up... please let me know. I´ll add anything I´m missing. Thanks.
April 7, 2021 at 21:54
(Leo) STPFan » s81
Very interesting. Thanks for the post and your knowledge. The only thing I really know about myself is... with my Gemini Mars I seem to be in need of stimulation where it´s intellectually or maybe something spontaneous? I do get bored rather quickly at times... but I guess with Cancer Venus combined... I do care enough to understand the other person´s feelings. Maybe it´s a soft sell approach? Might be even Libra Rising? lol I´m just me... what can I say?

I´m also intelligent enough to know and realistic to understand... hey... life will be life. Things don´t always go your way or drawn out to perfection. I listen to all sides of a story before judging. I´m more neutral than anything.
April 7, 2021 at 22:00
(Aries) Jay Jay
I have a couple of girlfriends like that - and we are just friends - long-time friends, but just friends. Some people are very involved in what they are doing or in their own world that they just do not reach out to others - not even friends - other than family. Their minds are on other things - and they don´t have any space around them to begin thinking about others. They are always happy when I call or visit, and tell me they are grateful that I keep in touch - and I believe them - but they do not initiate. I´ve had to accept this if I want to keep them as friends.

Without a chart, it would be difficult to speculate.
April 7, 2021 at 23:04
(Leo) STPFan » Morena_Lu
I appreciate your viewpoint and post. I can tell you I´m 100% she´s into me. I just can´t tell if she´s suitable for a day in and day out relationship. I´m not perfect by any means... but she´s set in her ways. Even though the common Joe or Jane would question her like... "What in the heck are you doing?" lol

I just don´t understand why she never calls lol or texts... and says... hey! I miss you! She comes across very COLD for the ones she loves... very strange.

My mother raised me very strictly... came across very COLD. I wonder if that´s why I´m drawn to her at times? I like to come across more loving and lovable.
April 7, 2021 at 23:08
(Leo) STPFan » nikkia
You should call or text your man out of the blue! Surprise him! He might be shocked! lol :37: Yes, men dig it.
April 7, 2021 at 23:51
(Virgo) RohiniMoon
You have Ketu conjunct the Moon in the 7th house.... Of others/partnerships

Moon also being the mother, that would have made your mother very detached, cold as you put it. Your mind here is isolated and feels separated from emotions of self and others. Ketu is loss and detachment, and also a "been there done that" planet as its representing your past life and what you already ´know" and fall back on in this life. .

In the past, you already did the relationships, you know all about that aspect of life, but Rahu on the ascendant in this life is pushing you to focus on yourself more than others... But wherever rahu goes in our charts, is what we try and run away from, instead clinging back onto Ketu, and what we already accomplished.

Having the nodes on the 1st and 7th axis is always about you and others. It´s the biggest lesson that you came back again to learn.

Maybe she won´t ever call, maybe she will always be cold and detached... That´s just something you will have to accept, but after 16 years I think if a relationship was going to would have by now? Maybe I´m wrong..?
April 8, 2021 at 00:08
(Aquarius) nikkia » STPFan
"You should call or text your man out of the blue! Surprise him! He might be shocked! lol :37: Yes, men dig it."

When my fiancé brought this to my attention, I explained why. He understood that this was an issue in my background and nothing personal against him (or anyone else!)

He explained that my calling him would make him "feel wanted." I HEARD him.

Rome wasn´t built in a day, so we agreed upon a specific time that I would call him.

He responded so beautifully to my calls. Had he been too busy to talk or gruff or didn´t answer, I don´t think I would have gotten to the point that I´d just reach out randomly, which I did, after a little bit of time.

This is what worked for us.
April 8, 2021 at 01:32
(Leo) SilverStar
My big question is what are you hoping for with her?

If she shows other positive signs and you know she likes you, then what is the big deal about her not initiating..

It could be that she simply likes the Alpha type to be the one to take charge, and is naturally submissive, or atleast wants to be that way with you..

It could be a number of other things as well-and some off the ball reasons that others have not stated- like maybe she hates talking on the phone, Maybe she has a stalker who tracks her phone, etc.. but I´m not the best at analyzing astrology charts so I´ll humbly let others do that...
April 8, 2021 at 05:11
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » nikkia
I was raised the same, my father is Pluto in Leo generation..

Still, I would call someone if we are together. I don´t have fire in my chart and my mars is weak..but somehow I always listen to my heart when love is in question, probably Venus in Pisces is above that Pluto in Leo influence I had all my life.
April 8, 2021 at 05:58
(Leo) STPFan » RohiniMoon
I appreciate your input and advice. It was a nice write up. Thank you very much. I guess sometimes you think about the important people who have entered your life... and you sit back and think why do they do the things they do? Like... not calling or texting someone first. But, when I call or text she always answers and always responds within minutes. Naturally, if someone disliked you... they wouldn´t respond. Maybe a day later.. or a week later.. possibly never. lol

I´m just basically average with astrology. I believe she has a lot of Neptune qualities? Like a strong Neptune output. At times the way she answers her questions she seems elusive, inconsistent, and illogical. That must be her Pisces rising? When we´re together... it seems the fun never stops... realistically a relationship can´t last if it isn´t somewhat grounded as well. She could also be bipolar as well?
April 8, 2021 at 05:59
(Taurus) Morena_Lu » STPFan
She has :152: and ruler of her chart in the Capricorn

This woman likes having things under control, and she does things in her own way, unrestrained and uninhibited by anything or anyone.

Often understated
The Moon in Capricorn woman is a very willful and ambitious individual. She will go forward with her plans, and her goals are anything but idealistic.

Pragmatism and realism come as a natural follow-up to her patient and cautious nature. She doesn’t allow herself any moment of weakness or vulnerability when it comes to putting her emotions at stake.

Stability and security are two of the things that really get this woman going, and once she knows that she can achieve these two, nothing can stop her from achieving her goal.

Moreover, she knows exactly how to approach most situations thanks to her serious nature and mature overview. She’s perseverant, straightforward, hard-working, and she knows how to take an opportunity once one appears.

This doesn’t mean that she doesn’t show any emotions at all, that she’s a workaholic who only thinks about getting rich and buying her dream house.

She’s also feminine, charming, sexy, seductive, and she drives a lot of men crazy with her elegant posture.

However, for the most time, she knows how to control this enthusiasm and inner happiness of hers. She will not show her emotions easily..
She has Mercury in the :178: in the 8 th house in oppsition with Jupiter, she is secretive about her life, she will never tell everything..even when you think she will.
Mercury rules the mouth, words, speech and communication, while Jupiter is expansive, huge and out of proportion. And in this case, it is out of proportion to its opposition, which is Mercury. This aspect reveals grand schemes, daydreaming on a huge scale and fanatical viewpoints and beliefs. There is a real struggle for balance in viewpoints. I think she likes to control her way of thinking because it is probably exsausting for her. I also have :153: in the 8 th.
I think that it is pretty cold moon, some people don´t like to express their emotions..Maybe you will always lack that warm, emotional side of the :152:that she doesn´t show that much to you.
April 8, 2021 at 06:15
(Cancer) wildfl❀wer » STPFan
She might respond as not many people call her and the rest of the time she prefers being in her alone time, some social awkwardness could prevent calling first esp someone who might be more outgoing, different from her because Neptune mirrors and she feels perhaps uncomfortable in this role so she postpones. I see also fear of communication with Mercury and Pluto combo, I think she prefers deep conversations and avoids small talk, besides, a bit career-oriented, time is precious for her and she might want to invest in smth solid. Maybe, she feels that there are other options (her Chiron between your Venus conjunct Jupiter which is opposite to Saturnian energy and she has ASC ruler in Capricorn)
April 8, 2021 at 06:24
(Virgo) RohiniMoon » STPFan
Hey - no problem :4: just trying to help you see it through the other lense...

Definitely agree about relationships not being all fun & games - you need stability as well.

Interesting you say she is a Pisces asc, you have moon in Pisces in your 7 th house - and as a Virgo asc, you will attract Pisces... So there´s that too. Haha
April 8, 2021 at 06:28
(Leo) STPFan » SilverStar
What am I hoping with her? Good question. For some odd reason... I felt emotionally closer to her in 2020 than any other year. But once I showed her my emotions she tried to make me jealous. It was almost like "Hey! I found this vulnerable spot in this guy for once... now I want to damage him." I found it kind of alarming because I never showed her that "emotional" side of myself. She never really advertised herself... meaning.. she always secured me. Never any jealousy. There was always kindness towards each other.

During 2020 she told me all of her past relationships/affairs in which I honestly never knew of. She can be very secretive it seems. They all damaged her. She tried turning her life to God and religion more in 2018. At first when she told me this... I was happy and confident in her. I always wanted to be helpful and encouraging to her. I´ve come to the conclusion that the God/Religion thing is an escape tactic. She doesn´t like to face reality head on. At times she will praise Jesus and 2 days later she will question him. I guess her life really turned for the worst now... and it´s like I´m trying to help her. But, while I was trying to help her... all she does is yell at me and argue. Blames me for all the years I never stood by her side. She blames me for all the extra affairs she´s had. It´s almost like I´m a deer in headlights. I can´t believe the things she´s doing now and her decision making. Seems like a cry for help. I guess you could say her conduct could also be a form of manipulation towards me? Maybe I opened up some door that was closed shut emotionally for years... but once she noticed it opening up... she pounced? I´ll never know the truth... and that´s life.

I can be super down to earth and reasonable in a one on one discussion. For some reason she can´t be reasoned with anymore.
April 8, 2021 at 06:30
(Cancer) wildfl❀wer » STPFan
" I felt emotionally closer to her in 2020 than any other year. "

Jupiter transited Capricorn....

Jupiter made her Moon warmer))

I also had a very good relationships with my Capricorn stellium mother

Capricorn girls need to see serious commitment to them
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