why I cause this type of destruction

March 28, 2022 at 08:37 (UT/GMT)
(Scorpio) MorningGlory
why I cause this type of destruction
Something I´ve noticed in my life is a particular theme. When I like/want validation from someone for whatever reason, I play into exactly whatever it is they want me to be. This creates a need for other people to interact with me/get me/use me (for whatever reason they think I´m useful for), then when I realize their flaws, get betrayed by them or see or any sort of trickery they´ve used to attain me, I ghost, or lash out extensively.

The issue with me is that I don´t do communication well. The whole ´i don´t like it when you do that´ just makes me feel like a nagging brat, and makes me think that you will change your behaviour in reference to me because I ´communicated my needs.´ I believe, if I observe you long enough, your true colors will show up and if it leads to the ´tower moment,´ so be it. This leads to eventually things coming to an end drastically with either me ghosting and cutting contact or being harsh. I´ve had people change their personalities, dedicate things to me on social media hoping one day I´d see, grown men cry, even claim to have become suicidal, I´ve made a crowd scream, been stalked physically, even was gang stalked online.

I´m not a bad person. I´ve done good deeds. I still believe in doing the right thing. I am just a magnet for bad people who bring out the worst in me. And it´s an ongoing pattern.

Can someone look at my chart and tell me why this is ?

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March 28, 2022 at 15:06
(Cancer) ZeinaZ
Hey,

Some things I´ve noticed that might contribute to what you described:

You have Sagittarius Jupiter, Mars, Venus and Asc. in the 1st ruled by Jupiter, amplifying what your identity, your desires and values with regard to your self.

Yet, they square Pisces Saturn (co ruled by Jupiter and Neptune) in the 4th, which limits that sense of expression and self, and indicates maturing as a person, especially with regard to your security and needs (4th house).

This links then to the Scorpio Moon in the 11th square Uranus in the 2nd (related to your values, security and body), ruled by Pluto in the 12th in its own sign, conjunct Sun and Mercury, indicating a person with a deep sense of self.

Your Chiron is in the 11th, co ruled by Saturn and Uranus indicating issues and healing in relation to others. It´s in a Venus sign, which brings us back to the self and its values.

Your Neptune, ruler of the 12th and Pisces, conjunct Uranus in the 2nd (Venus house), indicating experiences and changes related to boundaries and reconsidering assumptions regarding your security, values and body (ruled by Saturn).

What you´re describing is linked to that Neptune Uranus aspect that affects your Moon needs, which in turn affects your identity through the squares of Saturn to the Sagittarius placements.

Nothing in the chart indicates a person is good or bad, we could judge our behaviours according to what we value.

You´re trying to cope with the behaviours you described to try to find a sense of security, though that´s not found externally through relations with others until you express who are and feel secure within yourself. Then you might see less of these negative experiences, and your coping mechanisms might change.

I understand what it feels like since I have Neptune in the 7th, Chiron conjunct my Asc. Moon square Saturn, Sun square Pluto, and Venus in the 4th. People project things on me, I used to comply just to have relationships but ended up not feeling like I´m connecting with them, them seeing me for who I am, or being forced to be someone else to meet their needs while disregarding my own. Every time, I needed to leave these relationships, until I realized I needed to be myself to find people to see me for who I really am.

Just my two cents.
March 28, 2022 at 12:15
(Capricorn) stellium12
Your essence picked a good challenge for this lifetime. With a lot of energy concentrated in adjacent signs is almost like having to live two life´s. Your saggi asc supported by Jup, Mars, venus makes you probably adventurous, outgoing, comical so this is the way people see you. But your scorpio sun and moon crave a deep connection, trust issues, testing people for their devotion to you. Think of it combining fire and water in your daily life.

You need to learn how to live with these opposing forces. Check out your life path in numerology to see what it is telling you what you should be learning this time around.

I have a similar challenge between sag and cap and had to learn how to manage it.
March 28, 2022 at 11:26
(Pisces) Leo_Ness
whole sign, sideral.

Overall look a your chart brings exactly the same impression of deeply loyal, friendly, energetic unsettling energy you just describe.

Mars and Venus OOB is enormous, uncontrolled creativity and being in conjunction to AC and Jupiter in Scorpio it seeks for expansion among other people (Jupiter) but Scorpio also demands loyalty.

The loyalty is actually the key word for you since your 1st house that is full of planets in Scorpio.
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March 28, 2022 at 10:01
(Capricorn) Emanuel
Weird that you dont do communication well with that thicc Jupiter-Venus-mars in Sagittarius conjunct your Ascendant.

But maybe your Moon, Sun, Mercury in Scorpio in 12th house is responsible for this...


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