Why do I struggle to make and keep friends?

January 13, 2022 at 19:36 (UT/GMT)
(Capricorn) Astrokitty
Why do I struggle to make and keep friends?
I have few friends now and over and the years I have lost many people. I have extremely high standards and I am very loyal people seem to always to let me down. I am expert at cutting people out of my life typical Cap there!. Sometimes I regret it but usually I feel justified and know I have done right thing… on the whole I find most people disappointing.

However, as I am getting older I am becoming lonely… it was my Birthday yesterday and I had no one to celebrate it with. My main friends live overseas one in France the other in the US.

Can anyone see in my chart why I struggle to have lots of friends and why I don’t keep them?



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January 16, 2022 at 00:28
(Taurus) DrivenByTheStars » Jacamo
Hey Hun, you should look at asteroid Karma, the theme of your life. you have #a 3811 Karma :176:16°57´39" (4th house).

A previous forum question on here also said something similar to your answer and she is a gemini, with a bunch of sag in her placements. But both of you have Asteroid Karma in Virgo square your mercury. It seems that their might be a connection.
January 15, 2022 at 19:02
(Sagittarius) Jacamo
This is all great information. And, this is a question very close to my heart, because I too have no real friend at the moment...seems to be a common theme these days...perhaps there´s something in the air...I wonder what?

A question close to my heart, even more so, because I also have N/S nodes Gem/Sag, Gemini Ascendent, plus MC and Lilith. Plus N.node in the 12th house - so challenging!

I´ve done a lot of work on these exact issues, and a lot of introspection, and I´ve come to the general conclusion, that the nature of my soul (The ascendent in Esoteric, soul centered, astrology) is to be joyful and social, expressive and creative. Luckily enough, my N.node, destiny or the direction of your soul´s journey, is right there too! The purpose of all the challenges I face in my chart, and there are many, is to wake me up to what my soul´s purpose in this incarnation is, and then motivate me to fulfill it.

That wake up call may take a long time, and be painful, but I believe we souls chose our path before we incarnated, so there must be a good reason. I mean, potentially waking up to our soul nature and fulfill our soul´s desires? I dunno, could be worth it...

I wonder if any of that resonates. Thanks for indulging my Sagittarian fueled Gemini verbosity.
January 15, 2022 at 10:59
(Taurus) DrivenByTheStars » Astrokitty
Hello hun, please do not listen to JackSquids on here with their Shitty comments.

Some people who have no empathy or life like to hurt others in time of need. I am so sorry you lost your father Hun.

I am not a pro in astrology, but in a previous message in the forum, I wrote about the Asteroid Karma. Not many people are familiar with it or have any care for it. But for me I feel its the theme of my life. In other words,I see this Asteroid as main theme of the lessons you have to go through in life ( why you are here) .
Your asteroid :#a 3811 Karma :182: 15°32´56" (11)

Pisces which is the 12 house ( I feel as its isolating ) and Aquarius in 11th house ( Friendships) . That is your biggest lessons is self-reflecting and learning what happened? What needs to change? Self-awareness too is important. Your venus in aquarius retrograded might make you less detached to others, but I am not sure since I see it more with venus in aquarius , but not retrograded. The rest of your chart can help you understand your thought process and what needs to change. I believe that nothing is fixed in our chart.
There is this site I go for really deep readings of natal charts. It´s free and nice.

https://astrowin.org/home.php ( go to Online Calcs & Database) register and go to natal charts.

Sometimes the problem isnt really us , its just we attract the wrong people and figuring out what we need to change is a good start. I hope you feel better hun. Depressions are no joke, you got this. :79:
January 15, 2022 at 10:33
(Scorpio) edburke63
Sorry for the loss of your father, and also for the isolation for your birthday. Astrology is good for identifying personality trends and such, but trying to identify a single indicator for losing all of your friends over the years would probably be tough considering all of the other factors involved (where you were born, diverging life paths, changes in personality, etc.). You´d probably have to do a synastry chart for each one, I would guess. Don´t be so hard on yourself right now, during a difficult time.
January 14, 2022 at 09:33
(Pisces) 11 » Sagit
:39: :41:
January 14, 2022 at 09:27
(Capricorn) Astrokitty
Thanks for everyone’s kind input I am gonna try and respond individually as there is a lot to unpack.

thanks Again

January 14, 2022 at 02:53
(Sagittarius) Sagit
Off topic but...

My sister´s husband has 5 progressed planets in Libra.
Including Moon and Mercury.

That guy won´t shup the fuck up. You can´t get a word in
sideways even using a 10-pound sledgehammer.

And forget about making an appointment. Too many seconds,
minutes, hours, days, weeks, years, decades, centuries,
millenniums to make a decision on where, when and how, let alone why.

A cosmically, galactic know-it-all.

If the fucker didn´t "contract" stage 7 diabetes at age 42,
I would have super-glued his lips to his eyelid´s eons ago.

If ya can´t see it, ya can´t say it.

I hope. :5:
January 14, 2022 at 00:50
(Aries) JayJayAstrology
It usually is a combo of things - not just one thing. I can point out some possibilities.

With Jupiter on Gemini ASC - you could talk too much. Gemini can be chatty and Jupiter magnifies whatever it touches. Or, you could simply want to communicate more than most people and they can´t keep up with you. You could be overly positive. Sag and Jupiter can be a bit insensitive to other people´s feelings, being that they - along with Gemini - are very mentally-oriented.

Sun and Mercury are in Capricorn - and Capricorn doesn´t like dealing with feelings - AT ALL. It doesn´t like dealing with them or expressing them to other people. This is another component to the theme. You may not be sensitive to others as you are also not attentive to your own feelings.

The other thing about Sag DES and South Node in Sag is that you can have extremely high standards that nobody can live up to. Pluto in Virgo can add to that as Virgo also can have very high standards. The two of them can give a kind of critical, judging quality - even if you don´t mean to be. Sag is always evaluating and comparing and can come across as judging to others. Libra Moon can also be evaluative - comparing and contrasting yourself with others. This isn´t a bad thing - because we can learn a lot about ourselves through this libra energy exchange, but if the Sag is putting you up or down in comparison to others, then that´s not good.

I could go on still . . . but I have to go now. If you reply with a question, I will come back tomorrow, and follow up.

Anyway, I don´t know if you relate to any of this, but if you do, that might help explain your relationships a bit better.

I do western astrology readings, dream interpretation, and mind-body healing by a donation of your choice - and classes at reasonable rates. Sign up for my newsletter! NEXT CLASS: HOW TO PROFESSIONALLY INTERPRET A NATAL CHART, Course 1 - begins Saturday, February 5, 2022. https://thesoulmustsing.weeblysite.com/…
January 13, 2022 at 22:40
(Taurus) Rosincvist
Most of my father´s friends fell out of touch because they were alcoholics, there are no perfect friendships otherwise we wouldn´t be here!
:164: :192: :199:/ :160: midpoint exactly, that is tough!
You have ingrained engrams about how friendships are supposed to progress!
A spiritual work should ease the situation!
January 13, 2022 at 21:46
(Virgo) Astrocelestial

I am sorry for your loss.

At first, I saw Saturn on the cusp of 11th, which sometimes can lead to only a few close friends. But then the Nodal axis got my attention, which to me it looks like it matches in some way your story.

With North Node in Gemini, one of the important lessons in your life come from interacting with others. One of the lessons that this placement comes with is to learn to stay connected with others.

On the other side, South Node in Sagittarius can indicate a high intellectual background, very strong life beliefs and philosophies. As you mentioned, you believe that you feel justified and that you have done the right thing when you cut people out of your life.

No one can say it´s wrong or right. It´s simply what you think it´s good for you. Probably the key is to reevaluate if this belief is really helping you or not.

If you got some time, maybe you can dig deeper about this placement of North Node and South Node :).

I wish you the best of luck and hope better days are coming soon!
January 13, 2022 at 21:38
(Scorpio) Saiya » rohini moon
Hi, :6:

I am often disappointed with friendships too. I find it hard many times. Could anyone look at my natal chart why is it so? I have Neptune in 11th house? What does it mean? Thanks a lot.
January 13, 2022 at 21:02
(Virgo) rohini moon
i think it´s that 8th house. you have sun & mercury there, mercury as the significator for friendships, in the 8th with sun, can make the sun "burn up" friends in life, depletes that part of life, and in the 8th can show friends who put you in bad situations, or talk disparagingly about you..

just what stuck out first to me...

ketu in the 7th can also waste away relations with others.. "cut off" as you say, because ketu cuts. takes away..
January 13, 2022 at 20:28
(Capricorn) Astrokitty » Astromaria
Thank you I really appreciate that and I will google it Maria.

Hugs 🤗
January 13, 2022 at 20:18
(Sagittarius) Astromaria
Im so sorry to hear that.
I had a look at your chart, as I found myself relating to many things you were describing.
My first thought was that you had chiron in your 11’th house. And to no surprise, there it was for you.
Chiron in the 11’th house, I feel would explain a lot for you, try to look it up.
I have alwas had issues with friends, and like you said I have become a master in cutting people out of My life that I felt werent genuine. Always been the third wheel with friends and so on...
Its a really hard placement, But it helps to hear that we are not alone in this.

January 13, 2022 at 19:58
(Capricorn) Astrokitty » ram_goat
Wow are you saying I´m an awful person? Thanks!

Also please kindly explain why you put friends in parentheses.

I am suffering from depression atm and I lost my Dad on 3rd Jan so your unkind comment has done its job! I hope that makes you happy as clearly you derive pleasure in causing pain to others.

January 13, 2022 at 19:48
(Aries) ram_goat
Read the description for moon square mercury in your chart, and consider what houses are involved there.

Also consider Jupiter square Pluto and Saturn opp Pluto.

Saturn opposite Uranus.

Maybe it is you who are doing your "friends" a favor by dropping them.

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