Feeling of not being good enough since childhood.

August 10, 2021 at 13:09 (UT/GMT)
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com
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Feeling of not being good enough since childhood.
Hello,

ever since I was a little girl, this feeling of not being good enough always plagued me. Especially when it comes to communication and everything surrounding it, I would rather be quiet than talk in front of others because I was ashamed of the way I spoke and articulated myself(that especially during grade school).

Also, I feel like I can never catch some rest from bad and self destructive thoughts. My mind is always racing and I can never really focus on one thing because I just have to do multiple things at once and then break down when I get confused.:28:

People don´t seem to understand what I am saying and when I say something, I always have to explain it because it came off in a mean way or not in the way I intended it to be.

Can someone tell me how I see that in my natal chart and how to get rid off my problem?

thank you.
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September 21, 2021 at 07:42
(Sagittarius) guccirenea
Im sorry if i missed it written somewhere in the thread, but what did you mean when you said ashamed of the way you articulated yourself? Im very curious!
I was in speech therapy all throughout elementary school. I had a terrible stutter amongst several other issues. People still have a hard time understanding me, even now at 24.
I also have mercury in cap so maybeeee thats it??
September 20, 2021 at 18:38
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com » Ephemerall
System message: Post has been written by user UranianCapricorn, who already deleted profile on this website:
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chiron conjunct jupiter? What does it mean?
August 14, 2021 at 11:15
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com
System message: Post has been written by user Ephemerall, who already deleted profile on this website:
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!!Because you are prone to being a Libra, I will post a link at the bottom so that you can understand in depth what I am about to explain, but not just that I expect you to fully accept every part of it and even the things you think do not suit your Libra ascendant, because it is true in its full nature and you have to embrace it and then you do away and make better what you feel it is not right by finding a balance And only using its wing annoyed fits best a knife is not dangerous not if you´re a proficient user of it.

Here is a solution for you; astrology associates the descendants with your partner, I believe it´s who you are when you are in relation with people because it is your house of partnership, as you pass this bottom hemisphere.

I need you to type into your Aries nature; be alert with Knife like sobriety when dealing with people. No need to fight just sharp you need to know how to access that part of yourself. Every house in your chart is how you interact with that aspect of your life, so it is you. Even though Lilith Seems as if it´s a place where your most victimized relations ships, Lilith actually acts as your night and shining armour to fight for you that´s why she´s there because that´s where you stand up for yourself... she looks as if she is a victim she, but she us not is not you having here there is Where she will eff people up if they mess with you... what you cannot be cheated there, so congrats. Having her there is like you saying "no I have dealt with a lot in my life In terms of relationships I couldn´t have chosen, hence I will watch out for myself to make sure that I am being treated fairly, I might even go overboard! Just to make sure that my opponents don´t think they can get up without my sayso!" You can fight for yourself I know him seeming repetitive, but it´s 3 am 😅! that house where it conjuncts you Dsc, you can fight for yourself. Libra your sentence is the victim Aries is the inflictor so you see pretend this if you have Aries on your descendant times a gazillion as if you´re hiding the sword!

If you want I can do a full reading of your chart for you 🙂 I´m no professional, but Would like to help you feel strong about yourself especially Because you have Libra ascendant people

good luck

One more thing I should mention; your Chiron is inconjunct your Jupiter in the 10th house of your public face we should definitely talk about that!

Link: PS sorry for all the typos I don´t feel like editing it´s way too late for that😅

https://www.astromajesty.com/aries-…

https://synnisigns.com/lilith-in-si…

One last thing before I forget because I keep forgetting, where it mentions "partnership" in reference to the seventh house Dial it down a lot! It didn´t post anything about the needle Lilith opposite be ascendant a good so deliberately had only to get confused... don´t let it into your head. (I wish astrology would stop assigning roles limiting people telling them how you´re supposed to be In light of gender perspective we back when women were enslaved and told what they could be) one must know their chart. you have to wield it as your Tool because it is yours and nobody else´s. In the same way that your body belongs to just you, no house in your chart is owned by anyone apart from you. your 7 house is how you treat people in partnerships. If anyone planets fall there they´ll get the full effect of that house any aspect is just reflective of how you treat people. It is how you are with people you will be Arian when you´re in a relationship; it is who you are in a small team, although Not on the scale of the 11th house. And that, my friend, is cool!

Gn!
August 14, 2021 at 11:14
(Capricorn) AbelTJUH
You´re feeling unaccepted? I have the same problem, like I shouldn´t be here. But tbh here I think that´s the problem. But I always think of other´s problems as .... You know what´s the thing with me, I had prophecies or psychoses. And well long story short (sorry Southpark 4 copying that phrase) but what it comes to down to is this; my prophecies aren´t untrue, but they make me rather unhappy. So sometimes I keep thinking "If I was just like everyone else what would I think" and that is the following: I don´t know if this is gonna feel right but I Think what I would do is compare myself to animals instead of humans. Because then I´d represent something and they´d as well. For instance if you compare yourself to a bird, you might represent I don´t know a cave biome and the bird.. well the sky realm. But this will probably sound mighty weird as well, and that´s because I am keeping it 100 but. I dive really deep into my mind, and the only thing that matters - currently - and if I was less advanced or normal probably these biomes I was talking about - .. my homebrew numerology theory is something I made when I was 13, based on days of the week as well as astrology. But my point is: why do humans who don´t have this knowledge always compare theirselves to other humans?! Why not to an animal? Might as well, carpe diem!! :32:
August 13, 2021 at 17:04
(Aquarius) viv » fishscales
Yes we are all “ healers”. I’ve been a therapist as you know. My middle sister is an Anglican (Episcopalian) Spiritual Advisor and a bit of a mainstay of her church, She and her techie husband run a retreat centre. My youngest sister is married to a man who is a cabinet maker, church leader and profoundly deaf. She works as an interpreter in adult education and is a tireless advocate for people with disabilities. It goes back to grandparents... service is what you do type belief. I’m the “eccentric” one!
August 13, 2021 at 09:54
(Pisces) fishscales » viv
Well, that´s good! Just goes to show we don´t always embody the "traditional" meanings of our placements. Siblings are kind of the "secondary" meaning of the house...but still, if someone has Chiron there, I would usually say it´s a safe bet to think there´s some kind of problem in that area. But obviously...not always.

Sometimes, a house placement doesn´t reflect the relationship with the person who is represented by that house, but the other person themselves... can I ask if your siblings ,as individuals, could be associated with Chiron in any way?
August 13, 2021 at 03:18
(Aquarius) viv » fishscales
Hmm yet I have two younger sisters I get on very well with and also have Chiron in Capricorn in the third. Likely a whole Chiron cycle earlier. In my case it’s opp Uranus which has brought some radical events into my life. I’m not sure that wounding always comes from siblings with Chiron in the thirdI went to 5 different schools and had to make lots of relationship adjustments so I became quite conscious of other kids behaviours and who I wanted for friends from about 5 onward! I actually feel this placement can be more about communicating the depths. Some relationships are deeper and more intimate than others but all are to be appreciated. Sometimes the smile exchanged with the grocery clerk will fill your heart and make your day and theirs. Of course if you’ve been bullied this has to be healed inwardly before outwardly. With Chiron conjunct Sun there may be self doubt about writers self knowledge about her inner worth and radiance. With this position you have to see yourself before others see you. That’s why suggestions re journal writing, counselling, art and movement may help the expression issue and from there self acceptance, and from there fluency with expression and social acceptance. Re volunteering in the area in which we are wounded, one possibility would be to tutor in an adult literacy program or help out with language skills for migrants..
August 13, 2021 at 03:09
(Aquarius) viv » UranianCapricorn
Actually there are lots of online counselling services via zoom nowadays, you don’t even have to stay in area unless there are risk issues like needing mental health support that the Counsellor needs to be familiar with. Why not give it a try?
August 12, 2021 at 23:53
(Aquarius) Ways_of_Leavin' » UranianCapricorn
Surely that must have been very hard for you and have left scars (as it must have on anyone)... Like I said, you are definitely not stupid, and the more you believe this as a fact probably it should become more apparent for others as well.

I´m not sure how much you know about astrology but the 3rd house signifies not only communication but also siblings and the relationship with them, as well as the early schooling and childhood in general. As I mentioned you have Chiron here, aka "the wounded healer" which could create a feeling of woundedness in these areas. As was mentioned by others one way to deal with these wounds could be by helping others healing their own wounds related to these matters.

Know that no matter how difficult something may seem nothing is permanent, everything is temporary.
August 12, 2021 at 22:27
(Pisces) fishscales » UranianCapricorn
Nothing to be sad about...just one of those life situations we can challenge ourselves with by finding a workaround for...or a work-through is probably a better term...

See my earlier post regarding how to deal with Chiron :15:
August 12, 2021 at 22:12
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com » fishscales
System message: Post has been written by user UranianCapricorn, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Thank you, will do! :24:
August 12, 2021 at 22:10
(Pisces) fishscales » UranianCapricorn
"I have two older siblings (brother and sister) and I always had a very bad relationship with them"

Another symptom of Chiron in the 3rd.

I would suggest reading up on that placement. Some of it may sound familiar.
August 12, 2021 at 21:03
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com » JayJayAstrology
System message: Post has been written by user UranianCapricorn, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Thank you so so much for the info! :76:

I will definitely try everything out. I actually wanted to book an appointment with a counselor but due to CoVID-19 they don´t even do that anymore.

I do like to write and I want to do it more often too since I do it so rarely.
My mother always snoops through my stuff (always did since I was a little girl)so I am very careful with my notebook and other notes.

People tell me that I have a nice way with words. In a sense of that I can write beautifully.
August 12, 2021 at 20:04
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com » Ways_of_Leavin'
System message: Post has been written by user UranianCapricorn, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Hi,

I am a quiet person but I can be fidgety at times when I am nervous.

I have two older siblings (brother and sister) and I always had a very bad relationship with them. My brother bullies me and tells me I am stupid and all those other things so I am not in contact with him right now.

I actually was an out-cast during all the years I´ve been in school. People used to mock me for the way I speak -> my accent, my tone, my words, everything regarding talking.
August 12, 2021 at 13:25
(Aries) JayJayAstrology
A lot of good comments. The "not good enough" feeling is something a lot of people feel - and it can be caused by a whole lot of psychological factors and can be seen in a variety of ways in astrology. What you describe as a problem in communication is more specific, as well as racing thoughts, multitasking and then confusion and breakdown.

Bad, self-destructive thoughts can be caused by internalizing anger. In many families - we are not allowed to express our anger - and so we repress it - and then it can come back at us in the form of destructive thoughts.

The Sag South Node, 2nd house would be about you having beliefs and conclusions about yourself that aren´t true. You brought that forward from the past life - but it´s recreated in this one. Sun conjunct Chiron in the 3rd, says something similar. Your conclusions about your self-identity - are not based upon truth. Your faulty ideas go to the core of your being. In this life - you are seeking your true self - your loving Soulful self - and inner peace from the emotional turmoil that you have but can´t express. Capricorn does not like to express emotions. So, the tendency is to not sweep them under the rug. Sun, Moon, Mercury and Chiron are all in Capricorn in an intercepted sign - it´s all held in and not expressed verbally. I´m not saying you don´t feel your feelings. I´m just saying Capricorn doesn´t much like expressing them to others.

With Pluto in Sag, you may feel judged - and perhaps unfairly - which can make a person very angry.

I think this is a hard chart. People don´t observe me saying this often - although it happens. I say that because there´s a lot of support for "holding onto" bad feelings and thoughts rather than expressing them spontaneously.

Libra rising is a very sensitive placement. You can feel other people´s energy. A Libra rising has to be careful who they have around them in their inner circle - because you see yourself through other people´s eyes - you sense or explore who you are through interactions - or something like that. Venus is your chart ruler - and it is in Scorpio - a very moody sign - and Venus is conjunct Mars - the planet that could be angry, frustrated, irritated most easily. Then Saturn is in Gemini and in the 8th of repressed emotions. Saturn is focused on dark thoughts (Gemini) and holds.

Sigh. Mercury is in Capricorn and Saturn is in Gemini - and in 8th! They are in mutual reception!

I can easily see "racing thoughts" in the Aquarius IC - conjunct Neptune. Uranus contributes being in Aquarius. Aquarius has very VERY fast - lightning speed - thoughts. The IC is your most inward, private self.

So, now what to do about this. Most of your planets are in the lower left quadrant. This is saying - this lifetime is one very focused on self-development. This is good. This chart says that the big focus needs to be on your inner self - your emotions - your thoughts - your inner dynamics. You need to focus on and learn how to know your emotions.

I usually tell Capricorn people that it is less important to express all your emotions to others than it is to know your emotions and feelings yourself. However, if we want healthy relationships, we do need to express ourselves - to be seen, heard and recognized by those we love. And of course, we have to give them the same kind of attention. But we begin with knowing what´s going on inside of ourselves first.

We are not our thoughts and feelings. We are more than that. We are a consciousness that is bigger than those thoughts and feelings. So, it´s important to acknowledge that. I recommend meditation to everyone, because it helps us gain more control over our racing thoughts. You can do walking meditations - you don´t have to sit still to meditate. You can meditate doing the dishes- if you are observing yourself doing it. We can learn to choose what thoughts and feelings we want to have - with a lot of practice.

You may be multitasking - keeping super busy - in order to keep emotions at bay. It is a Capricorn strategy. I think since your Capricorn Mercury, Sun and Moon are in the 3rd house, that writing about your feelings would be something you can do. If you keep a journal - and just let your feelings come out in it - that could help immensely. You can write angry letters to people that you never send - just to get it all out.

Counseling is another good tool. Finding one you really like can sometimes be a challenge - but once finding the right person - a good counselor can be so very helpful! I had a great therapist in my 30s and I was so happy I did that! When we have a hard chart - it is wise to seek help when you are up against a wall. Some people have supportive charts - where they can find more avenues in which to resolve conflicts and to move forward. If you don´t have that, then it truly is wise to seek out others who can provide energy that can help you move forward.

Writing could be something you do professionally - as well as part of another profession - so, my guess is that you do have some talent for it anyway. This is - or can be - the most positive talent in the chart. Do you like to write? I highly recommend journal writing - and even short story writing - because we learn so much about ourselves through it. And it can be very fun!

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August 12, 2021 at 12:22
(Aquarius) viv
Hi there
Well I understood you perfectly ..at least I think so!
Just a few observations
You have a naturally introverted night chart (so do I) This is not bad unless you were born into a family of extraverted super achievers who always wanted you to be out there getting noticed !
Your moon is what they call balsamic eg approaching new moon. Demetra George says this is a life where you are giving away what you have learned and making ready for a new cycle. Often such people are very wise but only a few people seek out the hermit or mystic in their cave, so to speak.

You have Chiron conjunct your Sun in Capricorn third. My guess is you feel the pain inherent in contemporary society and all its injustices very deeply. There may be personal stories as well but my sense of this is your feelings lie deep and it is very hard to express them, or even be conscious of them entirely. You might do well to try to do some Authentic Movement (look it up) In this you catch a micro movement in your body and unfold it slowly into dance expression. No one need see you!

Interestingly you have a sunny Jupiter in Leo in your 10th
People may experience more of your warmth than you suppose! You also have Pluto in Sag .. this is generally about finding out what you value and living it with passion.

Maybe when you trust your passionate self more you will find that Capricorn third house will not so much constrain your communication as give it precision
Best Viv
August 12, 2021 at 11:00
(Leo) Miquaa
saturn is (conjunct creating a tension) with your moon which means you have restrictions, limitations and withdrawal when it comes to your voice. Meeting other people who are also finding their voice can help you a ton!
It is not all bad, when you face your restrictions and apply the right medicine routine and habit like trying to figure out how to say things better that could help a ton. Saturn is also conjunct Pluto that´s rough one as well but its telling me that you are a strong girl! when you communicate with people they might think you have weird philosophical ideas, don´t know what ur talking about or u just might challenge their thoughts too much but its okay just make sure before you speak you think.
you seem to be an analytical talkative and kind person just learn when the right time and right place is my dear!
August 11, 2021 at 13:58
(Pisces) fishscales » cubic
"The helping stuff does work with Chiron to overcome it."

You know, I´ve always found it strange...while I agree with what you said, it´s not really the position of traditional astrological wisdom...as far as what I´ve read, anyway...

Most things I´ve read say that you´re stuck with your Chiron wound, although you may have a special talent to help others with the same Chiron issues...

However, I´ve read some other esoteric (non astrological) materials which say things like:

"If you have an illness and want to overcome it, help others overcome their illnesses"

The basis of this thinking is that by helping others, you heal yourself through the accumulated good karma of helping others.

This seems to make more sense to me than "you´re stuck with your Chiron problems forever."
August 11, 2021 at 13:43
(Taurus) Astro-Seek.com
System message: Post has been written by user goldenlion32, who already deleted profile on this website:
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Mercury in Capricorn is kind of hard placement since it usually is karmic relationships with how we use our words in a negative or positive way.

Best advice I can say is if you say something make sure you follow through with action the best you can. If you have information make sure you do your research and it’s the true facts. Not always possible.

Uranus in Aquarius is future oriented and makes you feel like the lone ranger because it’s more about humanity, making the world a better place and other generations may not comprehend the advanced knowledge, insight, and intelligence.
August 11, 2021 at 13:25
(Leo) cubic
Agree with the proposed solutions and root of the problem by fishscales.

The helping stuff does work with Chiron to overcome it. I guess nowadays you can join discord and find some lil community there, if doing offline stuff is out of reach/time.
August 11, 2021 at 13:05
(Pisces) fishscales
You have Chiron in the third house of communication.

Chiron signifies a "wound" that you were born with, and that you may not neccesarily remember the origins of. What you are describing is in line with Chiron in the third house of communication.

To make things more intense for you, Chiron is also conjunct your sun, which is also in the third. In a way, third house affairs are the "center" of your existence, with the sun there...however, Chiron is injuring your sun´s ability to express there. It´s understandable how the situation is particularly frustrating for you.

I also noticed that your Mercury is square your ascendant. Mercury is the mind (and communication), and the ascendant is where you meet and engage the world. With the square, there is a struggle between those two things. Your mind may not seem to be able to cooperate with how you want to engage the world, and vice versa.

None of this is hopeless though.

I think the best way to remedy difficult Chiron issues is to help others who have the same issues.

Chiron is the "wounded healer", so he has a knack for helping others with the wound that he himself is suffering from.

Help others to find their voice.

You may be surprised, after doing that for a while, how your own communication issues are alleviated.
August 10, 2021 at 21:07
(Aquarius) Ways_of_Leavin'
My interpretations as to how we can see this in your natal chart: Mercury in Capricorn (and especially since you are also a Cap Sun) gives a serious mind that may question his own intelligence. I have this placement too and I think it´s true that we can sometimes come across as a bit ´hard´ or uncaring; we are just very ´matter-of-fact´. With both Sun and Mercury in Cap you probably have a serious outlook on life and can be prone to worrying. You are also ambitious (as in worldly ambitious), and with both planets (Sun + Mercury) in the 3rd house I take it as that you are especially ambitious about learning and polishing your language skills, and that you take pride in this?...

You have quite the Gemini influence with Sun, Moon, Mercury and Chiron in the 3rd house. Mercury in the 3rd H should bestow you with excellent mental capabilities and a thirst for knowledge. I´m sure that you are quite intelligent, only that Mercury square your Ascendant could make you have much nervous energy, which could for example manifest in talking too much at times. Or, simply make it harder for you to have your points come across. Would you say you are fidgety ? A racing mind, inability to focus - these are qualities I attribute to Mercury/Gemini, and possibly 3rd H.

Your 3rd house cusp is in Sagittarius, and its ruler, Jupiter, is in the 10th house. With 3rd H in Sag you are probably someone who is quite eager to learn - you are open in your communications with others, honest (perhaps quite blunt...), and may be philosophical in your thinking. With its ruler placed in the 10th house of profession/career, I´m wondering if your profession somehow might involve any of the communication fields, or work where you would be communicating much(?). Actually, I see now your 10th H ruler, Sun, is also placed in the 3rd H (!)

How to get rid of the mentioned problems: Mm... I have no simple answer here, as I think the solution is not very simple. Only, you are still quite young, and I´m sure with age that you will become more confident. Maybe rehearse, or e.g. make a recording before you do a presentation (if applicable) - listen through and see if you maybe can catch something ´off´ with your communication... e.g. do you notice talking faster due to getting nervous. Do more of what makes you confident and do things in steps.

Additionally, with Sun in Cap and Asc in Libra you care very much about how you are perceived. You might be plagued with self-doubt in general, but may find your confidence at work, or by working. Really, I´m sure everything will improve with age (as they say, Capricorn ages like a fine wine).

You also have Sun conjunct Chiron. Since Chiron is in the 3rd you may feel that it´s difficult to express yourself. Possibly, you have experienced some kind of trauma related to communications or learning. How was your experience at school..? How is your relationship with your siblings, if you have any ? Sun conjunct Chiron on its own may struggle with self-confidence; you may be shy about "shining" and can have difficulty expressing your creativity. You may be able to and be quite gifted at assisting others in these regards - maybe helping others overcoming their own communication or learning issues, or issues with confidence could be something that you would find useful and feel good about. Or, perhaps your words in some setting have the potential to heal them ? (I´m not really sure here; maybe others have any ideas) ...
August 10, 2021 at 20:31
(Virgo) rohini moon
Ketu in the second house.

Ketu in the second house of speech, family upbringing, what you value, what goes in and comes out of the mouth.

People I have known with Ketu in the second are always the black sheep of the family as well. There is always a disconnect from the family, in some way. Family may right there, living with you, but they are disconnected to you emotionally or psychologically.

Ketu in the second can also make a person brash with in their communication..in your case it´s sitting with Venus, whenever Ketu sits with a planet he takes some of that planets energy, because Ketu is "loss" so loss of whatever house he sits in plus whatever planet he sits with.

How to overcome? Hard work in terms of working on your own personality/ego. Letting go of that particular mind-set..


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