What zodiac sign are my worst female rivals in love?

August 9, 2021 at 16:47 (UT/GMT)
(Aquarius) Anushka42
What zodiac sign are my worst female rivals in love?
Hello, I want to know what could be my worst rival in love zodiac sign or signs, if there are many.
I haven´t started an important relationship because of another girl (based on what he said), from 15-16 june 2020. What could be her zodiac sign, that is the thurd party, the obstacle? He´s a leo asc taurus moon aquarius, leo venus, leo mars, though I don´t think his natal chart is that important.
I think she should be kind of a different energy than mine, but that has something similar, everytime a similar situation occurs.
One time one was a pisces moon capricorn, even though it wasn´t all her fault if that story didn´t succeed. In fact a pisces is somehow my opposite, for which I am an aquarius/leo female energy, and because of my rationality opposed to the pisces kind of thinking, as a archetype.
Basing mayne even on transits or intuitively, ehat zodiac signs could be my worst rivals now and from 2020?
Thank you.

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August 10, 2021 at 17:23
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » plumreme
It´s not a matter of it being fruitful, because I don´t ever want to be like her. I only want to experience what she already had, I want to grasp it off her.

My question on her sign is just for curiosity.
August 10, 2021 at 17:09
(Leo) plumreme » Anushka42
sure, she could be, but

1. strictly astrologically, I think it´s less about the sun sign than the overarching archetypal patterns in an individual natal chart. and..

2. then there´s the synastry/composite stuff. then transits ... my point earlier was that the "causes" are very complex if even knowable at all.

but then

3. all of this, all of it, is for naught if we get stuck in the doorway. We often don´t see the door as a door when we´re standing in it. We think it´s the destination. It´s small, though, and we´ll suffocate there. To be sure, there´s a time to stay there (during an earthquake, say), but then it´s time to walk through to vastness of what´s on the other side (you) which is the only place where you can use the information to any productive outcome. I have gotten stuck in the doorway (plastered to it, melted on it, ha) before. How? By not being honest with myself about why I´m digging, what I´m looking for, and by relating to the information as a means to control outcome with others (we can´t. not directly). I´m not saying you are doing this, and it´s unsolicited, my saying it - but I can´t responsibly ponder these questions without also offering this warning.

All things at the ripe time, of course -- goodness knows, we´ve all tarried on here in the doorway for a bit past our due as we begin processing, but -- thinking about her is really only fruitful as means to know (and grow) thyself. that´s the gold. Best of Luck!
August 10, 2021 at 16:40
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » plumreme
So you think she could be one of these 4 signs, or only that she could have values of these signs?
Thank you.
August 10, 2021 at 15:45
(Leo) plumreme » Anushka42
"So we could ask ourselves what kind of girl (what sign, what energy) is able to make fall in love a guy like him and make him be evil with me?"

I think this can be a useful question if not over-indulged (of course, the voyeur in me always wants to ponder it! and not just in my own situations) or if the meaning isn´t over inflated. (and I´ll speculate at the end... the dessert after the long, boring dinner, ha)

There are many lenses through which to tackle this question. I can speak to how it´s shown up for me, but it´ll likely be different for you

answering the question through a "healthy relationships" lens: it could be a matter of timing, different attachment styles and how each person reacts to that (how much awareness they bring, how much work they´ve done). but then the "why" ultimately doesn´t matter through this lens - the guy is unavailable (on some level - emotional, physical, whatever) and thus simply not a good option for a partner. Though, examining what in ourselves makes us go for that dynamic can be completely transformative! Why am I available to an unavailable person? Why isn´t this an immediate turn off for me? For example, personally, I found (in the past) I felt safer on some level with unavailable ppl b/c I was unavailable emotionally!
Interestingly, the qualities my "rival" had well developed make her much more available to everyday life type of partnership -- she´s willing to get real in a more earthly love that´s based on every day living, where I want to "keep things exciting" and dwell in the ideal, and maintain a bit of distance.

To illustrate this difference through an astrological lens (while I´m unsure of how much actual stock I put in this example) -- her Juno is on his Venus (grounded), where as my Psyche is on his Eros, his Pallas on my moon (dreamy, idealistic, but ungrounded in the every day).

For someone else´s love triangle, ha, one woman may link to man´s Venus, where the other links to his Lilith (how does he react to each archetype? and at what point in his life? consciously or unconsciously?) ... and on and on and on it goes with endless causal possibilities.

Ultimately, while it´s fascinating, the most useful thing for me, personally, has just been to say "not available (for any reason) = not right for me." period. the end. Astrology (which I obviously value and use a lot) may tell me the story that we´re soul mates spanning across lifetimes of both tragic and beautiful romances. but at the end of the day, is he available? Is he choosing me? Am I available?

This is how I´ve experienced your question on my own path, may be different for you, of course.

dessert (to be eaten with a giant grain of salt): I´d guess (based on what you said, though we don´t have his chart) that she´s got strong Uranian/Aquarian qualities, like you (he is Aquarius descendent). where it might be different? maybe she has more consciously developed Leo (your Chiron opposite sun/saturn, and lots of his planets there), Aries, Sag or Capricorn. I think this is all likely taking you right to the thing you´re wanting to develop *for you*. but... grain of salt.
August 10, 2021 at 14:31
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » viv
Yes, but it doesn´t answer the question what sign is she, that is blocking and impeding me to have him.
Maybe it´s not only because of her, I don´t know.
Nut I think the matter is that she lacks sonething I have as a person.

What does she have? The lack to have him, because she´s nothing worthier than a fly.
August 10, 2021 at 14:21
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » plumreme
It´s interesting but I don´t know what I can develop in this case, maybe self-confidence and being stronger.
Anyway he said she was similar to me for some reasons, so she must have some things he sees in me. Anyway remained the problem that he seemed to have decisive feelings for her than for me. So we could ask ourselves what kind of girl (what sign, what energy) is able to make fall in love a guy like him and make him be evil with me?
August 10, 2021 at 14:12
(Aquarius) viv » Anushka42
That’s worse he’s got a TSquare.. Well Plumreme’s been through it closer in time than I have.. I’d say if he’s intellectual take that into yourself!

Seriously the Jungians say work with same gender unconscious projections first eg what does She have? How can I get that too!! Then work with opposite gender (if heterosexual) What you’ve been in love with in the guy is more potent than what “potential female rivals”carry.

Sorry if I offered comment or advice you didn’t want,
Best Viv
August 10, 2021 at 12:58
(Leo) plumreme » Anushka42
She is Sag (in fact, stellium there with sun, Saturn, Uranus, Mercury). I´m Sag rising and moon and Neptune (so all that stuff of hers is on my moon and Neptune, and *opposite* my 4 bodies in Gemini -- Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Lilith.) She´s also Mars conjunct Pluto. I´m Mars conjunct Lilith. and those are inconjunct with each other´s. I know all of this b/c we were friends - fairly superficially (obviously), but we were. There´s really quite a lot of similarity. So for me the differences are really more thinking on archetypes and planets that are strongly developed in the other that I could use - not in a self shaming manner, just a "what could I take from this encounter to grow myself?"

I could say I was really unaware of the extent to which my underdeveloped traits were preventing healthy relationship. My "rival" sort of shocked (Uranus/usurper) me into clear sight. If you are only able to imagine the rival, b/c you don´t know her, I think that can be informative in itself - b/c we build those characters from ourselves. Maybe traits we think we lack but actually we have them, or traits we´d like to develop more. Imagining the ultimate rival, in fact, sounds like a great exercise for all of us in cultivating more wholeness.

Just from what you said - unlucky and desperate - I would think about your Jupiter and bringing it out more. and it´s trine your sun, so... And also that North Node in the 2nd (inner Venus, self reliant, opposite of enmeshment) in Sag (more Jupiter) is the opposite of desperate, and that´s where you´re headed. Not that there is something to resolve (tho, isn´t there always? ha) and just from a perspective of curiosity (and I´m with you, I find it fascinating), those may be the things in yourself asking for more focus from you, that you are projecting out onto the other (and so also it might be there in those archetypes that you´d expect to see development in the chart of the "other").
August 10, 2021 at 10:40
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » viv
Thank you Viv.
He´s leo rising taurus, not moon. His moon is aquarius.
I think I like his intellectual appearence, and his self-confidence makes me fall for him.

Knowing the sign if these other women it´ s just for curiosity, not because I´m trying to solve anything with that, it´s not a matter of solution to my situation with him, but I´m trying to figure out these feminine zodiac signs.
August 10, 2021 at 09:29
(Aquarius) viv
Thanks for raising this topic Anushka
My thought is if the potential mate you are interested in chooses someone else he/she’s not the one for you. There was something attractive...what? They awakened your longing.. so now you know more about what you long for. etc.

If another woman steps in maybe she will be like you in every way but one. Maybe she will even be born a day apart from you but have the Moon and Asc in a different place. (That happened to me once!) However if your partner chooses that other one that’s what they do! Maybe you fight for the relationship if it’s well established but if it’s only just starting let it go.

I’m a bit like you in that I have Scorpio rising and an Aqua Sun and I can tell you you cannot stage manage intimate relationships. It really doesn’t matter who the other girl may be. Your job is to be your radiant, sensitive, intelligent self.

In terms of signs the man you’ve been interested in, a Sun Leo Taurus Moon.. I don’t want make judgements for who knows? However that kind of guy likes to be the centre of attention and adored for their charisma. Aqua easily falls for Leo and Scorpio Asc falls for Taurus so you got a double whammy..but I might guess even if a person like that adored you, he probably wouldn’t understand you, and his Taurus Moon might well fall opp your Pluto making for some almighty fights.

I’d be wondering about hanging out with Libra friends who compliment your Jupiter 11th while quietly eying up the Sag guys or maybe Aries guys who would sextile your Sun and add some fire. Take that with a pinch of salt, there are dozens of possibilities.

You do have Pluto square your Sun /Saturn. There are likely to be issues with self confidence and realising your still hidden bombshell power. My suggestion would be is do some confidence building activities (coaching, rock climbing, public speaking, anything that takes you out of your comfort zone) until your Saturn return passes and get clear on just what sort of partner you want to live your life with. Saturn turns direct again in Oct after crossing your Sun again. This too will pass. You will have to learn to risk sharing and be willing to encounter someone different from you. Don’t worry they’ll be there.
Best Viv
August 10, 2021 at 08:25
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » plumreme
So, what sign is this third party in your situation?
I think that is underdeveloped in me maybe the behaviour of imposing myself and there´s the fact that I feel unlucky and desperate that brings me penalization.
August 9, 2021 at 19:28
(Leo) plumreme
Third party energy is something I´ve wondered about, too -- as in, what is *our* story, mine and hers? I´ve been on both ´sides´ (and around the same man) and it all feels very karmic.

The questions for me are in trying to be fair and objective, see my own responsibility, and most even ask "what can I learn from her? what does she have that is underdeveloped in me that would be beneficial for me to develop (which is, I think, to the idea of "opposites" that you mention)?"

One thing I know already, for example, is that the third party seems to be very intentional about taking care of her belongings, having less and taking better care of it, being diligent and committed (lots of Saturn/Capricorn energy, where I virtually zero, but am a Cap sun in Draconic chart). In stark contrast, I can be very scattered, whimsical and sometimes careless. I spill on my things. I loose things. I like new things and variety. ha. So I feel this as her being my underdeveloped Saturn.

I was also very naive and doe-eyed, where she has developed more cunning - the lesson I took there was that, while I don´t want to become cunning, per se, I did really need to develop more teeth and be more careful about how I share my energy and with whom (and she could likely benefit from adopting some of my trust, loyalty and openness - though, that´s not my business!).

We both have a lot of Sag energy. And strangely (or not) we also look very similar (as in get mistaken for each other), but with very different/opposite eyes - hers are small, sharp and scanning the room for opportunity; where mine are big, open and focused only on what is right in front of me, ha - but it perfectly reflects for me this over-arching similarity, and yet these polar opposites as you move closer.

It can a painful thing to ponder, but ultimately also very healing if used for reflection and growth, rather than blame of self/other or a twisted form of self-punishment. I know when I´m kind of pitted against someone by being in competition on some level, my impulse is to over focus on my own charms and their faults to feel better about things - so I try to consciously go in the other direction. but not too far ; ) and it brings more wholeness and meaning to the story.

It´s super interesting to me in terms of karmic encounters and which archetypes in each of us interact with the other´s. and it terms of what is to be gained through that encounter with the "rival", how it sharpens, opens, softens or sometimes breaks us. I feel like looking to the Draconic of one compared to the natal of the other is useful, but it´s just an inkling.
August 9, 2021 at 19:04
(Gemini) AmberMoon » Anushka42
So, you´re not looking at the chart... And from where are you looking at Lilith then?
August 9, 2021 at 18:53
(Aquarius) Anushka42 » AmberMoon
I don´t think it´s a matter to look in the chart.. Maybe lilith because it means the female I would like to be.
But I think it´s more a matter of personality.
August 9, 2021 at 18:19
(Gemini) AmberMoon
Girl, every female is your rival 😉, and who knows, every man maybe too.

Men/women don´t always choose similar lovers. Especially if the previous one didn´t work out, one may want to try something totally different.

But perhaps an interesting approach here could be to look at your resilience when in such situations faced with competition.

Actually quite curious myself as to where to look in the chart for that.

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